About datgamerchick : Jess. I'm 19, and I like funny things. Good grammar is sexy.
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datgamerchick's favorite FMLs
by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML
by [...] / 12/12/2013 at 9:28am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Kids
Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML
by OakStake / 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by #isthisthepoundkey? / 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML
by bobosgonnagetyou / 11/01/2013 at 2:04am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML
by Madster15 / 09/15/2013 at 2:05am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals
Today, my sister came out of her room sobbing uncontrollably. When I asked what was wrong, she put her fingers in my face and asked if they smelled like pickles, and if "that's normal for girls". They did. It's not. FML
by Carebeareatu / 09/14/2013 at 1:42am / United States (Texas) / Health
by ugh Buck! / 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm / United States / Animals
by spiritbeast33 / 09/11/2013 at 2:17am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/10/2013 at 9:23am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by ...thanks / 09/07/2013 at 10:17am / United States / Miscellaneous
by fml / 09/03/2013 at 2:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 7:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML
by SplishSplash / 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm / United States / Intimacy
by goodbyepromotion / 08/30/2013 at 2:28am / United States (Ohio) / Work
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…
- Today, I had to convince my husband that I'm not having an affair all because I refused to have sex… Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and… Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden…