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datgamerchick

Offline (the 05/29/2015 at 10:59am) | Search for a member

datgamerchick

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5032
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About datgamerchick : Jess. I'm 19, and I like funny things. Good grammar is sexy.

datgamerchick's page activity

Visits<b>ukeandfoodislife</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:01am<b>papashaan</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 11:56am<b>SeanV979</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 12:46am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 1:52pm<b>TheRugMan</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 11:32am<b>Fustercluck</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 7:53am<b>felixhdez</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 7:43pm<b>Liamj774</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 7:05am<b>metizic</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 12:29am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 9:07am<b>BeautifulLiesx</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 2:30pm<b>kmaheynoway</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 4:38pm<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 3:35pm<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 5:25pm<b>FBellesLife</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 8:16am<b>IParkerBeasley</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:46am<b>Dudster25</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 3:01pm<b>AcousticKid1</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 1:28pm

Fucked!<b>felixhdez</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 1:44am

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datgamerchick's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, my mom and I went to exchange a massive stuffed animal, which was meant for my niece. I was carrying it when I saw a really hot guy looking at me funny. My mom snickered and told him that I never go anywhere without "George". FML

#21325643
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31253) - you deserved it (2891)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:52am - misc - by thanks a lot mom - United States (California)

Today, while in the yard, my 18-month-old son decided to take off running into the road, where a car was driving. I rushed after him, only for one of my dress straps to suddenly break without warning. It must have looked like I was trying to flag down the driver with my flailing tit. FML

#21183414
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44165) - you deserved it (5855)

On 06/21/2014 at 7:14pm - misc - by icandothecancan - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51305) - you deserved it (5929)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at my first day working at Walmart, a customer asked if we have any egg cookers. I said I wasn't sure, but that I'd be "eggstatic" to go ask for him. The first clue I got to suggest he hated puns was him yelling "Don't get smart with me, boy!" and then threatening to kill me. FML

#21180841
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42360) - you deserved it (9484)

On 06/19/2014 at 4:10pm - work - by fuckmyjob (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

#21116666
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42386) - you deserved it (8300)

On 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while reading the paper I saw a picture of a guy I really like that I met online. The picture is in the obituaries. No wonder he hasn't called. FML

#21103818
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47634) - you deserved it (3809)

On 04/03/2014 at 5:22pm - love - by kubbyp (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49356) - you deserved it (12631)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

#21061154
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53095) - you deserved it (5268)

On 02/15/2014 at 2:11am - work - by chinaski7628 - United States (California)

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

#21051355
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42236) - you deserved it (21939)

On 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Evolution mama (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, while at a funeral for a distant family member, I was giving my condolences to the family. When one of them asked how I was doing, I replied with, "I'm still alive!", which is one of my standard responses due to being a cashier and being asked that question a hundred times a day. FML

Today, there was a forest fire in my town. I was still forced to go to school, as it was safer. A lot of people decided not to go, and we ended up doing nothing but watching the news reports. There, I got to see my house burning on live TV. FML

#21030359
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67872) - you deserved it (4159)

On 01/16/2014 at 10:42pm - misc - by Fire sucks. (man) - United States

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46004) - you deserved it (4950)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

#21019316
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51458) - you deserved it (18346)

On 01/06/2014 at 6:00pm - animals - by Z3R0G5 (man) - United States (Indiana)



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