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daniela521

Offline (the 12/17/2015 at 3:06pm) | Search for a member

daniela521

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Los Fresnos, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 May 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1290
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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daniela521's page activity

Visits<b>rareawesomeness</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 12:47am<b>andy594328</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 6:06pm<b>davered89</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 9:12pm<b>JonD63</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 2:46am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 2:29am

daniela521's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of daniela521's badges

daniela521's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having a conversation with a new friend when she remembered she needed to grab something from her car. I don't know where she parked, but it's been two and a half hours and she's still gone. FML

#21485228
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23076) - you deserved it (2061)

On 10/27/2015 at 9:52pm - misc - by fjsinedniend - United States (Montana)

Today, after finishing a bottle and a half of pure cranberry juice to flush my bladder for a possible infection, I've been spewing liquid shits all day, my asshole burns and it hurts to sit. FML

#21484437
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22204) - you deserved it (5467)

On 10/26/2015 at 12:42am - health - by Anonymous -

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML

#21483617
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29391) - you deserved it (5737) - Translated from the version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/23/2015 at 11:17pm - intimacy - by Walter (man) - Spain

Today, my classmate went into rage mode and cursed at me, complaining how it's so unfair that I'm allowed to wear a hijab in class but she isn't allowed to wear a Flamingo hat. FML

#21483299
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26282) - you deserved it (6064)

On 10/23/2015 at 4:17am - work - by idontmakethedresscode - United States (California)

Today, as I tried to parallel park at a busy spot downtown, a group of teens jumped in front of my car and started a slow clap. FML

#21482971
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21649) - you deserved it (2665)

On 10/22/2015 at 12:46pm - misc - by moonbears - United States (Oregon)

Today, my wife is unreasonably mad at me for telling our kids to call toilet paper, "Butt Floss". FML

Today, my District Manager was impressed by all the appointments in my upcoming calendar. Bubbling with pride, I blurted out "Oh, I just love to have all my slots filled!" The awkward silence was only broken by "That's what she said!" from the next cubicle. FML

#21420435
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25905) - you deserved it (5402)

On 06/03/2015 at 9:59pm - work - by officeditz - United States (Florida)

Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML

Today, it was hot out, so I wore shorts. My dad took one look at me and said, "Your thighs are so pale, it's like staring into the sun". FML

#21413979
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24849) - you deserved it (3132)

On 05/22/2015 at 11:55am - misc - by xolaurennnn - United States

Today, I was at my best friend's house, listening to him complain about his mother remembering all the bad stuff he did when he was in high school. I jokingly said, "An elephant never forgets." Guess who was behind me. FML

#21413204
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23366) - you deserved it (10217)

On 05/20/2015 at 7:21pm - misc - by BannedfromFriend - United States

Today, I caught my ex trying to slash my car tires with a knife. She actually had the balls to claim she was testing my tire pressure, before power-walking off into the distance like nothing had happened. FML

#21410715
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29384) - you deserved it (2620)

On 05/15/2015 at 9:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I stuck my hand out the car window and noticed my arm fat flapping in the wind. FML

#21409639
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24436) - you deserved it (9837)

On 05/13/2015 at 7:19pm - health - by windthroughmyflab - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I somehow got into the conversation of what the weirdest thing we have ever found in food was. She said she found paper in her fortune cookie; she was serious. FML

#21406274
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30285) - you deserved it (2839)

On 05/07/2015 at 3:52pm - misc - by Random737193 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a guy asked me for my number. Now I deeply regret giving it to him, because he won't stop sending me Bible quotes and pictures of Jesus. FML

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML



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