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dancingprancer

Offline (the 11/19/2014 at 8:59am) | Search for a member

dancingprancer

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 444
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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dancingprancer's page activity

Visits<b>clumsyninja13</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 12:19pm<b>YoShaggy</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 11:13pm<b>mxcowboy</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 2:14am<b>Randy_Orton</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 12:13am<b>cluch3</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 8:21pm<b>Stevieray20</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 5:47pm<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 2:08pm<b>kingjohnson924</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 1:28pm<b>JafarH</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 8:50am<b>apndi</b> - the 10/25/2012 at 8:37pm<b>Toby13</b> - the 04/05/2012 at 1:39am

Fucked!<b>clumsyninja13</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 6:19pm

dancingprancer's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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dancingprancer's favorite FMLs

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

#19511225
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22624) - you deserved it (2423)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

#19455929
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15444) - you deserved it (35822)

On 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, after we got home from the doctor's office, my mom checked the voicemail. Loud and clear, we both heard my boyfriend's break-up message. My parents had already forbidden me from dating. FML

#17928381
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18065) - you deserved it (25629)

On 10/07/2011 at 3:00pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after having my car been broken into the day before because I didn't lock it, I made sure I locked my doors. When I got off shift and entered the parking lot, I noticed a brick had been thrown through my windshield and a note that said, "Nice Try". FML

#17037512
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41430) - you deserved it (3267)

On 07/09/2011 at 3:04am - misc - by JohnyP - United States (Ohio)

Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML

#16980115
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34374) - you deserved it (8011)

On 07/05/2011 at 12:04am - work - by Stacy - United States

Today, I jokingly told my girlfriend that sperm kills acne, she laughed and said "so that's how you got rid of yours so fast" then continued to text all her friends and tell them. FML

#16957068
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15548) - you deserved it (45420)

On 07/03/2011 at 1:51am - intimacy - by fmylife7721 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58951) - you deserved it (4526)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I got into a staring contest with my dog. I actually cheered when I won. FML

#16447532
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26148) - you deserved it (11464)

On 06/01/2011 at 3:39am - animals - by Lifeless (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60581) - you deserved it (12647)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as I put my 4 year old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

#13450247
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23972) - you deserved it (8657)

On 10/14/2010 at 8:25pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, we were in the car with my puppy, who favours my sister. She had been sat on her lap for a while, when she stood up and climbed onto my lap. I was really pleased until she peed on me and then went straight back to my sister. FML

#13082882
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32914) - you deserved it (3276)

On 09/17/2010 at 2:30am - misc - by PuppyPeeTimee. - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
419 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32010) - you deserved it (28499)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML

#12198220
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13841) - you deserved it (34109)

On 07/30/2010 at 12:26am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while lifeguarding, I saw someone in the wave-pool who appeared to be drowning. So, I jumped in to attempt to save him. Turns out he wasn't drowning, he only had one arm. He yelled at me. FML

#12042807
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32500) - you deserved it (4513)

On 07/22/2010 at 10:48am - work - by GuardOtto - United States



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