dafuqdidihear

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dafuqdidihear

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 976
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

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dafuqdidihear's page activity

Visits<b>crystalhale</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 4:20pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 6:27pm<b>IngePelsers</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:00am<b>rhiley</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 6:13am<b>PumaGator</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 11:27am<b>turdwrangler</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 2:43am<b>Druu</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 12:19pm<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 12:02pm<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 11:38am<b>Esoomian</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 12:24pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 9:20pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 11:28pm<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 6:43pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 3:59am<b>_Could_Be_Worse</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 4:30pm<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 5:28pm<b>aspenmoon</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 2:49am<b>Birdbath123</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 3:05pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 12:27am<b>rhiley</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 12:12pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 5:28am

dafuqdidihear's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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dafuqdidihear's favorite FMLs

Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and began throwing merchandise everywhere, including at my face, because we are Canadian and don't have a show called "Extreme Couponing" for "devoted shoppers" like her. FML

by ohgodwhy / 11/27/2012 at 6:46pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years old. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2012 at 12:23pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

by Heather / 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML

by KtSue / 11/12/2012 at 12:25am / United States / Health

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

by ananymous / 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was getting out of the car when I saw a dark figure approaching me from behind a shed. I screamed and threw my bag. It also threw its bag, due to the fact that it was my shadow on the wall. FML

by ktreens / 10/19/2012 at 12:06am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought some perfume that I thought smelled absolutely amazing. Later, my boyfriend walked in, sniffed, and said, "What smells like bacon?" The bottle cost $83. They won't take a refund. FML

by baconlady / 08/31/2012 at 3:06am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife and I got in a 4-hour heated argument which resulted in her begging for a divorce and admitting that she cheated on me. This all started with us arguing about the instructions for our new IKEA table. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2012 at 10:56pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a job interview. The interviewer spoke to me for a few minutes, then said she would be right back, and left. I was left alone in a room for an hour and a half believing that it was a patience test. They closed the store for the day, leaving me in the interview room. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2012 at 11:31pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, some guy asked me if he could borrow my lighter. I said "of course," reached into my handbag, and gave him the lighter. He stared at me for a few seconds until I realised I'd given him a tampax. FML

by mary / 08/09/2012 at 2:10pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 1:59am / United States / Animals

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

by justlittleoldme / 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work