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d_mellette's favorite FMLs
Today, I finally met my long-distance boyfriend of three years for the first time in person. After an amazing dinner and movie date, we went back to his house, only for him to dump me half an hour later. Not because I wouldn't have sex with him. No, his cat doesn't like me. FML
by dragonfyre73 / 01/06/2015 at 7:32pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, the sewage pipe busted on the side of our house, spew fecal matter and the condoms I recently flushed. My parents now refuse to talk to me, and won't let my girlfriend anywhere near the house. FML
by ===== / 01/14/2014 at 12:59pm / Pakistan (Sindh) / Miscellaneous
by russianfail / 12/04/2013 at 11:24am / United States (Texas) / Work
by Broke / 12/04/2013 at 3:27am / United States (Texas) / Money
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- Today, I helped a nice middle-aged lady pick out a sweater. She then opened her changing room door… Today, we were fooling around and I was just about to orgasm when she looks at my clock and says "I… Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying.…