About cswens25 : Just an ordinary, totally unique conformist. A little misguided but shit, c'est le vie.
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cswens25's favorite FMLs
Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML
by protoplasm stole my seat / 01/25/2013 at 8:24pm / New Zealand (Waikato) / Miscellaneous
by lonely dreams / 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy
Today, I ate brunch at my in-laws. The food all tasted off to me so I didn't eat much, telling my mother-in-law I was watching my weight. Later on, while out doing a bit of shopping, I stopped at a red light. Guess who pulled up next to me while I was scarfing a fast food burger. FML
by drkate25 / 12/18/2012 at 5:02pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, I called Costco to ask them not to renew my membership because of financial problems. The man on the phone spent 30 minutes telling me why I'm a fool to leave and I ended up with a renewed $55 membership and 25 minutes over my minute allowance. FML
by TKay916 / 11/20/2012 at 3:47am / United States (California) / Money
by karmaquestionmark / 11/19/2012 at 9:04pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML
by Anonymous / 10/26/2012 at 8:24am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous
by Kallian / 10/25/2012 at 3:08am / Australia / Money
Today, I let a friend borrow a power saw. When I found it on my porch later, the blade was missing and the cord was cut. Looking closer, I realized it was his saw. He kept my new one. He totally denies that he switched them and now won't answer his door. FML
by petra84 / 10/22/2012 at 6:34pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by thebeachisthatway / 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by dateless / 09/21/2012 at 7:48am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love
by GMD / 09/18/2012 at 4:20pm / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Health
Today, after having a long talk with my mother about gays, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grand kids." FML
by EvilMother / 09/13/2012 at 8:57pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my friend swapped my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my phone. My girlfriend is wondering why I asked her permission to leave the country, and my probation officer said she can't wait to see me again. FML
by Anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 1:34pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by scot / 09/02/2012 at 11:38am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, I found out that my crush didn't remember calling me beautiful, telling me he liked me, or any of the other romantic things he said to me while drunk last night. He did however remember me promising to bake him cookies. FML
by coolcocoxxx / 08/25/2012 at 2:53am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I visited a new tattoo parlor, as my previous artist made me uncomfortable with his drunken,… Today, I screamed so hard during a nightmare that I developed Laryngitis. I work in a call center.… Today, I found out my hours at work were getting cut and given to another employee. Not only are my…
- Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.… Today, I’m at this huge beach party in Thailand. I kiss a beautiful girl and decide to take it to…