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crystalxa

Offline (the 07/24/2015 at 10:13pm) | Search for a member

crystalxa

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Grand Rapids, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 January 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4553
  • Number of comments : 185
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About crystalxa : I love my furr babies, and Harry Potter.

crystalxa's page activity

Visits<b>Droffir</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 4:08am<b>ajean97</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 2:29pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 8:41pm<b>FlamingJazkinz</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:25am<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 12:12pm<b>tyler_jay</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:35pm<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 10:39pm<b>gavdarv</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:17pm<b>vegasked</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:46pm<b>LoganBubblez</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 12:01pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 2:23am<b>arule2012</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 12:55pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:21am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 11:57pm<b>Genius_Kitty</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 2:19am<b>mip_92</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 11:12am<b>codazombie</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 7:39am<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 1:16pm

Fucked!<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:22am<b>rogwest</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 1:45am<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:22pm

crystalxa's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

See all of crystalxa's badges

crystalxa's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss called me in to have a serious talk. The "serious talk" was him asking me to notify him of my menstrual cycle ahead of time so he can "avoid that shit". FML

#21446059
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24157) - you deserved it (2439)

On 07/23/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Ma_Nikka (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife came back from her camping trip with her friends. I decided to help her out by unpacking her stuff while she used the bathroom. It's funny; I never knew that a dildo, a ball gag and an open pack of condoms were considered camping gear. FML

#21427521
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35971) - you deserved it (2582)

On 06/17/2015 at 10:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband came too soon during sex. He then tried to pretend it didn't happen and continued. He humped me with a half-erect noodle for about seven minutes before I finally called him out. FML

#21394468
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32410) - you deserved it (4929)

On 04/16/2015 at 1:04am - intimacy - by Evra (woman) - United States

Today, I lost my virginity in a porta-potty. FML

#21389255
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16862) - you deserved it (42439)

On 04/07/2015 at 12:19pm - love - by NotALuckyGuy - United States (Ohio)

Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML

#21387543
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31991) - you deserved it (2504)

On 04/04/2015 at 1:32pm - health - by fuck right off (man) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, an old man approached me at work. I smiled and asked, "Hi, can I help you"? He looked at me for a few seconds before replying, "Fuck me, you need to lose some weight!" and then wandering off. FML

#21379495
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27358) - you deserved it (3228)

On 03/22/2015 at 1:41pm - work - by { o } (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, one of the guys I work with ran his finger down the back of my shirt and said, "Just checking to see if you're wearing a bra today". FML

Today, I got a haircut. The guy quickly cut off most of the hair above my forehead. When I angrily asked him what he was doing, he said, "Quitting." FML

#21369589
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35449) - you deserved it (2287)

On 03/06/2015 at 10:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to sit and smile as a drunk lady ranted about how body hair on a woman is disgusting and unfeminine, then in the next breath say that only pedos like women who shave their vaginas. That's the last time I ever have dinner with my boyfriend's parents. FML

#21369265
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29173) - you deserved it (2125)

On 03/06/2015 at 11:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought How To Train Your Dragon and the cashier started complaining how her kids keep demanding dragon stuff and that mine will start after they see the movie. I don't have any kids, and I didn't have the courage to tell her I was buying it for myself. FML

#21362244
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26822) - you deserved it (4738)

On 02/23/2015 at 11:58pm - misc - by MDoremis - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

#21344108
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31187) - you deserved it (9608)

On 01/25/2015 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by Orgasmataz (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my husband came home, drunk and with lipstick smeared on his face. When I confronted him about it, he just slurred, "Ah don't worry babe, it ain't mine." FML

#21343515
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33439) - you deserved it (2654)

On 01/24/2015 at 3:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my boyfriend and I had 'car sex'. It sucked and resulted in him masturbating into a McDonald's bag. FML

#21335578
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32375) - you deserved it (6952)

On 01/12/2015 at 2:56am - intimacy - by briiiiiiii123 - United States (New York)



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