Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 11/13/2015 at 4:20am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 551
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About cre8tvlylicnsd : Nitwit, oddment, blubber, and tweak.

I'm Palestinian-American and proud of both heritages.
#FreePalestine ✌️

Chris Hardwick, if you're seeing this, will you marry me? 😉

cre8tvlylicnsd's page activity

Visits<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 6:54am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 3:43am<b>MysticAmmu</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 10:29pm<b>int15</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 4:56pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 1:14pm<b>Karennnx</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:13pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 2:51am<b>slutfactory</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 2:24pm<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 2:18pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 9:50pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 3:59am<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 6:24pm<b>tygerarmy</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 9:19pm<b>Typicall</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 3:56pm<b>Kitty_Kat16</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:10am<b>basssss</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 5:22pm<b>Norja</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 12:42am<b>weirdangelz2</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 4:31am

Fucked!<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 12:54pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 3:50am<b>laurenfretz</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 2:37pm<b>pussystank</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 4:34pm<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:28pm<b>devildog562</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 2:48am

cre8tvlylicnsd's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of cre8tvlylicnsd's badges

cre8tvlylicnsd's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was closing up at my sandwich-making job when a huge bus full of basic, snobby, preppy cheerleaders came in. They literally "can't even" decide what they want. FML

Today, my roommate let out a blood-curdling scream in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was going on, only to find her sitting on the toilet, topless. Turned out she'd tried to pierce her own tit using a clothespin and a needle. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35362) - you deserved it (3124)

On 02/15/2015 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

Today, someone walking my way started waving. I waved back until I realized he wasn't looking at me. To make things worse, while walking past he said, "Get a fucking friend." FML


I agree, your life sucks (36249) - you deserved it (3480)

On 02/11/2015 at 8:39am - misc - by TJFuentes (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my roommates told me they want me to move out of our apartment. We would have never gotten the apartment without my credit score, and most of the furniture is mine. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35026) - you deserved it (2631)

On 02/10/2015 at 1:05pm - misc - by ididn'tevendoanythingwrong - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my beloved dog. Why? Yesterday she asked me who I'd choose, and I honestly said that I would choose the dog. FML

Today, I got attacked by a monkey. My country isn't even supposed to have monkeys in it. FML


Today, I have bad adult acne. This wouldn't be so bad, except that it's only on one side of my face. I look like a Batman villain. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30370) - you deserved it (2506)

On 01/15/2015 at 2:28am - health - by twoface_chick - United States (California)

Today, my sister compared me handling the news of recently being told that I have a devastating and very possibly fatal autoimmune disease, to that of a teenager being melodramatic. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34951) - you deserved it (2682)

On 01/02/2015 at 12:37am - health - by Sisterly Love - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31929) - you deserved it (4634)

On 12/31/2014 at 3:08am - misc - by driverboy - United States

Today, I called asking about a job I interviewed for 3 weeks ago. It's a scummy call center where known drug addicts work. They told me I wasn't getting the job. I guess my high school diploma and being drug-free makes me not good enough to work there. FML

Today, my wife started a 24 hour urine collection as directed by the doctor for her pregnancy. She has to collect the urine in a gallon jug, and refrigerate it. At lunch time, I went to go get the rest of my sandwich but was unable to find it, until she suggested I "look under the piss jug." FML

Today, I met my new roommate. I hadn't even gotten her name yet, because the first thing she said to me instead was that she wanted to hang her confederate flag on the wall. I'm black. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37552) - you deserved it (4766)

On 12/29/2014 at 12:00am - misc - by okay17 - United States

Today, my 8-year-old daughter was throwing a tantrum, and I said "Keep this up and I'll tell Santa to take your presents back." She told me I don't even know Santa, at which point I accidentally blurted that I'm "Santa". FML


I agree, your life sucks (31338) - you deserved it (12414)

On 12/24/2014 at 10:01pm - kids - by Santa (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, as I walked into McDonald's with my mom, she glanced at me and said, "Smells like your future." FML


I agree, your life sucks (31025) - you deserved it (3762)

On 12/24/2014 at 6:56pm - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I found a hornet's nest in the backyard, so I called my brother over to take a look. He said "Hmm, wonder how fast you can run." then hurled a rock at the nest and sprinted back to the house. I wasn't so fast. I now feel like someone's beaten me half to death with a cactus. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35075) - you deserved it (3817)

On 12/24/2014 at 9:43am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: