crdavis93

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Offline (the 12/06/2014 at 9:55pm)

crdavis93

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 27 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1954
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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crdavis93's page activity

Visits<b>bloo_isanonymous</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:52pm<b>WillowB47</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:18am<b>ItsFeztho</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 11:31pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 11:35pm<b>sarah1024</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 3:04pm<b>Lost_in_Fantasy</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 4:13am<b>neeni88</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 2:08am<b>lo_and_behold</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 11:49pm<b>FistToBalls</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 6:48pm<b>brennanives</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 10:31pm

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crdavis93's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML

by Loserbot / 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

by sal / 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy

Today, I posted a Facebook status on how I hated the new Batman movie. I'm now single, and have received multiple threats. FML

by Deaththreat101 / 08/08/2012 at 4:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I visited my mother's new apartment, and found a picture of yours truly hanging above her toilet, and I asked why it was there. She shrugged and said, "Because the thought of you makes me want to take a shit?" FML

by Alisha / 08/07/2012 at 2:04pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

by kalikanna / 07/07/2012 at 2:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

by Jobby / 06/30/2012 at 8:48am / Health

Today, I found out that my wife and two teenage daughters' periods are all one week after the other. I am living in hell almost every single day. FML

by anonymous / 06/14/2012 at 10:54am / China (Jiangsu) / Health

Today, I proudly told my elitist dad that I now have a beautiful girlfriend. He didn't believe me, so I showed him her Facebook. He demanded that I stop seeing her, saying that the duck-facing in her avatar was the hallmark of "a lower form of being" who would only ever shame our family. FML

by idontgetit / 06/12/2012 at 7:39pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

by creeped out / 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that instead of training my cat, she has been training me. She now refuses to drink anything but running tap water, and yowls loudly early in the morning at my bedroom door to be fed. FML

by Anon127 / 06/11/2012 at 10:40pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I noticed the only time my husband stops snoring like a drunken horse is so that he can fart. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2012 at 1:26am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went to the store for some pads with my dad. We got them and then went to the cashier. That's when he realized that they were scented. He took one out of the box, sniffed it, made me sniff it, then insisted the cashier smell it. FML

by vron991 / 05/13/2012 at 1:02am / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

by ShadowJack / 04/29/2012 at 11:10am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I visited my new doctor, hoping that he would be able to figure out the cause of the pains I've been having for years. He told me there's nothing he can do, that half the drugs out there cause cancer anyway and that I should look into homeopathy. Great. FML

by freakofnature / 03/31/2012 at 12:17pm / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, I had to explain to my 15-year-old son why it wouldn't be a good idea to include a picture of the red Power Ranger in his "Weapons throughout history" project. FML

by laststand11 / 03/28/2012 at 6:49pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids