Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

crap_that_sucks

Search for a member

crap_that_sucks
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 64
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

crap_that_sucks's last visitors

fmlnjd2013colemarie63illegalbeagle69logan1423atl904Le_Doctornialls_princess1sammy1021Batgirl124allstarrider

crap_that_sucks's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of crap_that_sucks's badges

crap_that_sucks's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm in the process of adopting a child. When I called my mom to tell her the news, she just said, "Oh honey, don't adopt, it's the worst decision you'll ever make." I'm adopted. FML

#21110479
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40749) - you deserved it (2448)

On 04/11/2014 at 5:58pm - kids - by babylove - South Africa

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57308) - you deserved it (27372)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44389) - you deserved it (6056)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, there was a forest fire in my town. I was still forced to go to school, as it was safer. A lot of people decided not to go, and we ended up doing nothing but watching the news reports. There, I got to see my house burning on live TV. FML

#21030359
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65028) - you deserved it (3959)

On 01/16/2014 at 10:42pm - misc - by Fire sucks. (man) - United States

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

#21026645
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46799) - you deserved it (3991)

On 01/13/2014 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had to pee during a supervised lockdown. I asked my teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to my dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking for someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including my principal. FML

#20996748
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42111) - you deserved it (4250)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:56am - misc - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to half of my class that yes, my birthday is on the same day as Hitler's, but no, it does not make me a Nazi. FML

#20981261
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38264) - you deserved it (2274)

On 12/05/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by happy birthday to me (woman) - United States

Today, my neighbor put up an electric fence to keep my five-year-old son out. FML

#20980679
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34106) - you deserved it (10958)

On 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm - kids - by Awkward - United States (Washington)

Today, the day before I'm supposed to leave for a long-anticipated trip to Europe, my mother admitted that she's never paid for it. She only told me she did so I would stop hinting that I wanted to go. I gave up Christmas for this trip. FML

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

#20568124
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39648) - you deserved it (3305)

On 03/31/2013 at 9:32am - kids - by The_Black_Jesus - United States

Today, I was talking to an attractive guy, but I was so nervous that I got tongue-tied and then blurted out, "Stupid autocorrect." FML

#20501923
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14592) - you deserved it (24705)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:57am - misc - by tongue tied - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

#19117009
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23886) - you deserved it (4003)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymoosey - Canada

Today, while all the other marines got to fly around the island on a helicopter, I got stuck on gear guard. What was I guarding? The staff sergeant's parking spot. FML

#16320641
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27905) - you deserved it (3210)

On 05/23/2011 at 10:41pm - work - by rogerusmc23 - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I discovered that I don't have Herpes or Genital warts. I have acne on my penis. FML

#5082348
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53539) - you deserved it (8101)

On 09/06/2009 at 2:19pm - health - by Curt (man) - United States (Missouri)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: