- Town/Country : Not specified
- Title : Miss
- Birth Date : Not specified
- <3 status : Not so sure
- Number of visits : 4802
- Number of comments : 162
- Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted
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About cosicosei : .
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by BathroomMuch / 12/25/2009 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I met a close friend of my husband for the first time. She told me it was amazing that I agreed to be in an open marriage and asked if sex was weird knowing he'd slept with other women. No, the sex wasn't weird, because we're not in an open marriage. FML
by Anonymous / 10/30/2009 at 5:19am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy
Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML
by APetsPet / 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
by jentown11 / 09/28/2009 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I met my boyfriend's father for the first time. We were at a restaurant and my bofriend kept playing footsie with me under the table. When my boyfriend excused himself to go to the restroom, the game of footsie was still going on. FML
by ohcrap / 09/28/2009 at 12:10am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML
by auscop / 09/17/2009 at 6:57am / Australia (Western Australia) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 07/30/2009 at 5:23am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, while driving home with my parents. I pretended to be asleep so mum wouldn't talk to me. They then took this time to describe what they were going to do to each other when they got home. In full detail. FML
by Joel_mama / 07/26/2009 at 9:12pm / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/11/2009 at 3:22pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, it was my boyfriend and my six-month anniversary. I've really fallen in love with him, and I know he loves me the same. So I got him a really nice gift, a watch he's had his eye on for as long as I've known him. It was expensive. What does he get me? A condom. Three actually. FML
by Anonymous / 07/05/2009 at 12:57am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything I replied "guess". He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently I've been bitchy. FML
by tamp / 06/22/2009 at 3:47am / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
Today, I allowed my five-year old daughter to paint my fingernails during a living-room "picnic" we were having. A while later I got called back in to work for an emergency meeting. When I arrived at the meeting I noticed my fingernails were still neon-green. I am a 40-year old man. FML
by psychortiz / 06/03/2009 at 1:40pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I was doing a fitness test. Though clumsy, I managed to spin around a bat then dash across a balance beam, run through some tires, and walk across a log floating in water. Pleased with my performance, I walked to the bathroom, tripped on my shoelace, and busted my head on the floor. FML
by Clumsy / 04/25/2009 at 5:09am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my blood type is B. My parents are type A and type O. It's not genetically possible to be blood type B if your parents are A and O. This means I am either an adoptee, a mutant, or an illegitimate child. FML
by hedgehog5 / 04/11/2009 at 3:14pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous