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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 July 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2598
  • Number of comments : 130
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About confusedAsFuck : Apparently, my dick wants to whack her

confusedAsFuck's page activity

Visits<b>Sia_Will</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 12:31am<b>mehibud</b> - the 08/27/2016 at 7:05pm<b>CamBamShamDaMan</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 8:28am<b>kev1316</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 12:48am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 4:38pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 6:31pm<b>stasyrene</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 10:20am<b>ADOG2645</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 2:27pm<b>hoosiergirl94</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 11:19am<b>courtly25</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 2:20pm<b>Wvoh</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 11:58pm<b>hman1025</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 10:40am<b>captainwhiskers</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 12:38am<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 7:46pm<b>HeatherCorinne</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 2:20pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 1:46am<b>kissychick</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 6:43pm<b>TreeTreeMan</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 1:21am

Fucked!<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 7:46am<b>izkiz</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 5:44am<b>_SpencerM_</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:22am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 12:30am<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 9:06pm<b>kyle23011</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:59pm

confusedAsFuck's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of confusedAsFuck's badges

confusedAsFuck's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

by aherdofpigs / 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm / United States / Animals

Today, my daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she thinks she'll be by then. She said, "Thirty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2013 at 11:19am / United States (Arkansas) / Kids

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. I was screaming and writhing in pain, and my eyes were shut for most of the ride to the hospital. We stopped, and I was thrilled because I thought we were at the ER. I was wrong. My dad had stopped to order a cheeseburger. FML

by mcdonalds / 08/06/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Health

Today, a cute guy asked for my phone number and I gladly gave it to him. I was feeling really good about myself for getting hit on by the star football player. That was until he called 8 times and left 5 messages. In 2 hours. FML

by WhoaThere / 12/18/2009 at 12:23am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that just because your boyfriend asks you to marry him doesn't mean that he will show up at the wedding. FML

by Loveless / 07/19/2009 at 9:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

by Angelofkarma / 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Love

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML

by Rhyno / 05/05/2009 at 11:37am / United States (New York) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went to have a sperm analysis done at the fertility clinic. I spent an hour trying to masturbate into a cup but I was too anxious and couldn't finish. There was a knock on the door, a clinician and a lab assistant both were there, wondering if I was ok. I have to go back next week. FML

by alpine75 / 05/03/2009 at 12:47pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

by soontobedivorced / 04/19/2009 at 12:05am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 17 months, the first guy to tell me he loves me, the guy I lost my virginity to, the only guy whose parents I've met, told me we should stop 'hooking up' because it's weird that I was telling everyone we were a couple and it was ruining his chances of finding a girlfriend. FML

by hannah / 04/14/2009 at 11:21am / United Kingdom (Devon) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

by meteorbabe0101 / 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Health