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colton_colton

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colton_colton

93Fucked!

colton_coltoncolton_colton
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3999
  • Number of comments : 169
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 43 posted

About colton_colton : No, the girl is not my kid, she's someone I watched at my church VBS, but i do love her :)

colton_colton's page activity

Visits<b>SpankyRaven</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:23am<b>Colourize</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 11:08pm<b>valerie_273</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 6:07pm<b>Shipley18</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 5:27pm<b>catchmypanties</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:18am<b>keifman7</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 5:11pm<b>constipation</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:20am<b>iYamEmoRay</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 12:26am<b>it_happens06</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 11:04pm<b>greenbucket</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 4:13pm<b>venomousflower</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 1:45pm<b>kellymonster</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:47am<b>Timber16</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:17am<b>7liv7</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 10:44am<b>JulietVoltora</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 7:13am<b>xX111514Xx</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:02am<b>LilyLi</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 7:22pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:14pm

Fucked!<b>ChampHero</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 6:58pm<b>abv96</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 12:20am<b>oreily12</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 9:23pm<b>skye147</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 3:27pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 10:12am<b>vonvaski</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:24pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 8:39am<b>Loveme_Hateme16</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:52am<b>sparkles8595</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:35am<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:01am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 9:20pm<b>seetei</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 8:47pm<b>youngmuller1</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 7:53am<b>StrangeNigga</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 4:43am<b>horrorbabe1408</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 6:57am<b>FaguIous</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 2:54pm<b>kikoma</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 10:47pm<b>latinablanca</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 7:32pm

colton_colton's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

See all of colton_colton's badges

colton_colton's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

#20622674
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73300) - you deserved it (10115)

On 04/26/2013 at 5:17am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML

#20199046
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11380) - you deserved it (38457)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

#20155904
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42290) - you deserved it (1941)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62485) - you deserved it (3310)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I went to my regular pharmacist of three months, and since I've always seen him on a crutch, I asked him how his leg was. His response: "Still missing". FML

#19903690
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23787) - you deserved it (6464)

On 07/07/2012 at 3:26am - misc - by sozzy - United States (California)

Today, I was having an argument with my girlfriend in front of our friends. I didn't want her to spoil my good time, so I ignored her until she disappeared. She re-appeared thirty minutes later just to throw a punch that would make Muhammad Ali jealous. Our friends' reaction? They clapped. FML

#19884925
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8691) - you deserved it (42161)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:51am - misc - by ali (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was running late and couldn't find my purse anywhere. My sleep-deprived brain came up with the brilliant idea of trying to phone it. FML

#19756229
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18380) - you deserved it (4552)

On 06/08/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by PEGASISTER FOR LIIIIIIIIFFFFFEEEEE!!!!! (woman) - Mexico

Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML

#19600497
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26217) - you deserved it (2695)

On 05/09/2012 at 11:34pm - misc - by I Don't Exorcise - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

#19494291
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26093) - you deserved it (2485)

On 04/19/2012 at 2:24am - money - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

#19276997
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22074) - you deserved it (3538)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:19am - money - by me - United States (Florida)

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31462) - you deserved it (9691)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, thanks to some asshole with a padlock, I got trapped in porta potty for over an hour. FML

#18553074
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32239) - you deserved it (2551)

On 12/19/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by stinkyhair (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML

#18444451
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11742) - you deserved it (44480)

On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -



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