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cocainewhore

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cocainewhore

9Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6095
  • Number of comments : 113
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About cocainewhore : Heavy fucking metal.

cocainewhore's page activity

Visits<b>Rawrshi</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 1:40am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 5:30pm<b>waitingtoolong</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 5:57am<b>jerryj</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 3:17am<b>miketopgunmike1</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 2:59am<b>Mc_Knapkins</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 10:39pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 8:53pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 8:51am<b>ramirolwb</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 5:36am<b>mushroomcassette</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 5:56pm<b>kooljac702</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 2:07am<b>caleb_ohs</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 10:25am<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 5:37pm<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 12:53pm<b>capnbzarr</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 6:08pm<b>Valiantonias</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 6:13am<b>deutschmadchen</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 6:01pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 11:38pm

Liked!<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 1:53am<b>shouldntbehere</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 2:34pm<b>xpolymer</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:48pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:51am<b>joshtapp</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 9:07pm<b>RA91</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 8:42pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:30am<b>zsaddayz</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 7:44pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 9:09pm

cocainewhore's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of cocainewhore's badges

cocainewhore's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to endure my father going on a sexist rant about how women shouldn't be allowed to go to university because it's "unrealistic" since "all women" become stay-at-home mums. This is the same man who threatened to kick me out if I dropped out of uni. FML

#21299878
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31865) - you deserved it (2623)

On 11/15/2014 at 10:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML

#21286497
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27767) - you deserved it (11615)

On 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm - health - by lady parts - United States (Illinois)

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

#21285546
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34844) - you deserved it (4968)

On 10/26/2014 at 9:54am - kids - by Bob H. (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my brother and I were talking about Ebola, when he says he would love to have the disease because of how famous it would make him. Plus, his college essays about him "fighting through the disease" would be "phenomenal". FML

#21278125
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34535) - you deserved it (3053)

On 10/15/2014 at 12:55am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a massage. I guess I hit the spot, because he muttered, "Please marry me" into the pillow. Considering we've been going out for years and had spoken about marriage before, I stopped in my tracks. He stammered, "Oh, I mean... Not like that. Will you keep going?" FML

#21272255
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35584) - you deserved it (3678)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

#21270711
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45517) - you deserved it (10268)

On 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by SadMother - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30237) - you deserved it (3836)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother is so overdramatic that her response to finding out I lost a friend's book was that I should fake my own death rather than fess up. FML

#21265006
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30371) - you deserved it (2772)

On 09/25/2014 at 7:19am - misc - by hylianprincess (woman) - United States

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42506) - you deserved it (11636)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend visited my restaurant with some guy I'd never seen before. She introduced him to me as her "new boyfriend". She was always a cold bitch, but I never saw this coming. I had to serve their food while choking back tears, and I couldn't work up the nerve to spit in it. FML

#21260464
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51461) - you deserved it (4988)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I video-chatted with my mom and showed her my new, very short haircut. My dad walked in, took one look at me and said, "I can only attribute this to penis envy," and walked out again. FML

#21259205
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28764) - you deserved it (4141)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:31am - kids - by HeIsKindaRightTho (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I sat in on a university-level physics lecture, listening to my hyped-up co-students approximating the hypothetical situation of the Sun consisting of gerbils. The conversation then continued towards how much better energy/mass ratio the gerbil-sun would have compared to the actual star. FML

#21258867
89 comments

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31799) - you deserved it (18274)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I was told by my teacher that she had 'given up' teaching me because someone had told her I have a mental illness, and that I don't understand what she says. FML

#21254331
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38982) - you deserved it (3576)

On 09/08/2014 at 6:55am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend again told me how he wants to have an open relationship. Of course, this means he can do what he likes with anyone, but if I so much as kiss someone else, I'm a cheating slut. FML

#21252587
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48467) - you deserved it (7646)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by onlywantuanyway -



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