christge1beast

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christge1beast

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2693
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About christge1beast : I'm a rather interesting person I'd like to think. I enjoy meeting new people. I come off as shy and quiet, but once you get to know me I can be quite the opposite.

christge1beast's page activity

Visits<b>bisousmaddie</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 1:56pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 8:10am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:14pm<b>MysticAmmu</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 9:04pm<b>xcllla_</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 12:13am<b>ciaraash</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 6:37pm<b>DMA0712</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 5:40pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 11:41pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 4:13am<b>ForbbidenSky</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 4:13am<b>Alexxandre</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 5:54pm<b>GEFStryker</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 4:50pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 6:10pm<b>JayGatsby</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 1:01am<b>yoitsbeau</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 9:42pm<b>Al3xv3l92</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 5:30pm<b>TeenDragCarm5sos</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 9:24pm<b>queen2016</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 8:34am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 1:44pm

christge1beast's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of christge1beast's badges

christge1beast's favorite FMLs

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

by mayoshampoo / 09/01/2014 at 12:59pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a customer wandering around, looking confused. I went over and kindly asked if I could help him find anything. He said no, but that he'd help me find the teeth he'd knock out of my mouth if I didn't get lost. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2014 at 11:14am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2014 at 12:16pm / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

by Anonymous / 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

by whotouchedyou1 / 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

by fuck you, tasha / 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, I talked to a girl I like. I tried to make her jealous by telling her I had a "thing" going with another girl. She looked deeply into my eyes and said, "Wait, aren't you gay?" FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2014 at 11:37am / United States / Love

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

by humdrummitydrum / 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm / United States / Health

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, my dad asked me how I would feel about going on an all-expenses-paid, month-long holiday to the Caribbean. I was ecstatic and broke into tears of joy, saying I'd love it. He replied, "Yeah, me too. Shame it ain't happening!" then left for work, laughing his arse off. FML

by xXshitface4uXx / 07/25/2014 at 6:46pm / New Zealand (Bay of Plenty) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend, because he's too manipulative. By the time our chat ended, instead of being single, I'm somehow now committed to going on vacation with him and his family. FML

by whatjusthappened / 07/21/2014 at 11:58am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

by Lisa / 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, after nearly three weeks of hard work, I finally completed my best drawing yet, a self-portrait. I was incredibly excited to take it to class tomorrow. That is, until I came home from a walk later on, only to find my brother had drawn a stick figure on it, wanking into my face. FML

by ~~~ / 06/29/2014 at 1:08pm / Australia (South Australia) / Work

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2014 at 10:33am / United States (California) / Love