christge1beast

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christge1beast

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2536
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About christge1beast : I'm a rather interesting person I'd like to think. I enjoy meeting new people. I come off as shy and quiet, but once you get to know me I can be quite the opposite.

christge1beast's page activity

Visits<b>bisousmaddie</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 1:56pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 8:10am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:14pm<b>MysticAmmu</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 9:04pm<b>xcllla_</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 12:13am<b>ciaraash</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 6:37pm<b>DMA0712</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 5:40pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 11:41pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 4:13am<b>ForbbidenSky</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 4:13am<b>Alexxandre</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 5:54pm<b>GEFStryker</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 4:50pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 6:10pm<b>JayGatsby</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 1:01am<b>yoitsbeau</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 9:42pm<b>Al3xv3l92</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 5:30pm<b>TeenDragCarm5sos</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 9:24pm<b>queen2016</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 8:34am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 1:44pm

christge1beast's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of christge1beast's badges

christge1beast's favorite FMLs

Today, after telling my husband he can send me dirty texts any time, he sent me one from work. It said, "Babe when I get home, I'm gonna go 9/11 on your pussy ;)". I'm still not sure he understands why that was so offensive. FML

by The Soul Of A Damned Queef / 01/30/2015 at 11:04pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I showed my son the old trick of turning a calculator upside down and spelling "BOOBIES" on it in numbers. He laughed, then spent nearly 20 minutes trying to spell "COCKS", before giving up and hurling the calculator across the room. I wish my sperm had a warranty. FML

by 3722145 / 01/30/2015 at 7:51pm / United States (Indiana) / Kids

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

by Orgasmataz / 01/25/2015 at 5:10pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy

Today, a girl from class screamed at me in public for hugging the guy she likes. She threatened to take me out if I didn't "back off". That guy is my boyfriend. FML

by exuberant_orange / 01/08/2015 at 10:56am / United States (Florida) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

by smooth / 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm / United States / Work

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, while shopping with my father, I had to use the restroom. As soon as I opened the door to the men's room, my father yelled that it was the ladies' room. I then turned around and went through the other door, where I ended up getting bitch-slapped. FML

by wowdadreally / 12/23/2014 at 3:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a first date with a guy, I spilled ice cream all over my pants. He bought me some more, and as I was thanking him, he said, "You've never had a guy treat you right, have you?" I said no and started crying. FML

by Soulara89 / 12/22/2014 at 8:28pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML

by Gassy and sassy / 12/07/2014 at 1:15am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, I felt bad about rarely complimenting my mom about her cooking, so during dinner, I raved about her incredible, creamy, macaroni and cheese. It came from a box. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2014 at 11:48pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML

by ring-a-ding-ding / 12/06/2014 at 12:18am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask my crush what he wanted for Christmas. He said "A girlfriend." I took off my Santa hat and yelled "Ta-da!" He added, "An ATTRACTIVE girlfriend." FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2014 at 11:28am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, my boss said he's worried about our network, because "Wifi's all in the air. People could spy on us from anywhere!" I sarcastically said "My god, you're right!" and suggested switching to tin-foil ethernet cables to stop the signal escaping. He told me to do it ASAP. This moron makes five times my salary. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2014 at 3:15pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous