chrisamagod

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chrisamagod

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 September 1983 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1273
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About chrisamagod : army

chrisamagod's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:41pm<b>SapphireSympathy</b> - the 05/05/2011 at 5:13pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:51am<b>FrecklesXO</b> - the 01/15/2011 at 11:42pm<b>yourmurderscenex</b> - the 12/19/2010 at 11:54am<b>MagicShyStars</b> - the 12/19/2010 at 11:11am<b>xxlaine13xx</b> - the 10/05/2010 at 9:48pm<b>sugarr0babby0</b> - the 09/28/2010 at 2:45pm<b>glitterbabe224</b> - the 09/23/2010 at 2:12pm<b>FierceeeeeeeKate</b> - the 09/19/2010 at 7:07pm<b>greyy_goooose</b> - the 09/14/2010 at 5:48pm<b>Sweetest_Cherry</b> - the 09/08/2010 at 10:14pm<b>ciaobella</b> - the 09/08/2010 at 12:15pm<b>goldhighways</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 6:11pm<b>katiboo</b> - the 09/06/2010 at 10:27pm<b>DayummAdriana</b> - the 09/06/2010 at 4:38pm<b>kshizzlekt</b> - the 09/05/2010 at 9:45pm<b>prettypink786</b> - the 09/05/2010 at 4:28pm

chrisamagod's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

chrisamagod's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my girlfriend of four years is legally married to a man in prison. He gets out next week. FML

by fouryearswasted / 12/19/2010 at 12:14am / United States / Love

Today, the guy who got off when the elevator's doors opened had a very embarrassed look on his face. I didn't think anything of it till the doors closed. Turns out he was running away from his deadly fart. FML

by lizard / 12/18/2010 at 12:56am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I planned to drop a water balloon on my visiting prankster brother from my new apartment's balcony. As he crossed the street, I launched the balloon, and sent it right behind him. It hit an eight year old on a scooter. FML

by bullseyed / 12/07/2010 at 11:20pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2010 at 2:29am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, I was watching this show about fat people. I was wondering how people could let this happen to themselves. Then I looked down and saw a giant bowl of popcorn, ice cream, potato chips, and soda. I thus figured out how people do this to themselves. FML

by Somethingswrongwiththispic / 08/05/2010 at 4:17am / United States / Health

Today, I tried drinking "Smart Water" for the first time. I couldn't figure out how to open the bottle. FML

by tstaeger / 07/24/2010 at 1:20am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said 'Nice chair.' She replied 'Nice bruise' and punched me in the nuts. FML

by Liam. / 02/01/2010 at 12:15am / Love

Today, I was driving in the car with my boyfriend and he couldn't keep his hands off me. Nothing to complain about when your boyfriend likes to touch you, right? Except when he keeps smacking your jiggly thighs to watch the ripples and 'tenderize the pork chops'. FML

by porkythighs / 12/27/2009 at 9:19am / Singapore / Love

Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML

by CH / 12/07/2009 at 1:06am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

by LondonKitsch / 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML

by LALALALA / 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to go tanning. I went outside and took my top off and laid out in the sun for about an hour. When I was about to go inside a phone rang. It belonged to one of the five men that were working on my roof and watching me the entire time. FML

by fihifgni210 / 05/20/2009 at 12:54pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a commercial for some sort of meaty beef dish. The camera zoomed in and my mouth watered because it looked so delicious. Then flashed the next scene: golden retrievers running through a field and eating from their bowl. My mouth just watered for a dog food commerical. FML

by Anonymous / 04/15/2009 at 2:19am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids