About chimcharx3 : Hi.
chimcharx3's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
chimcharx3's favorite FMLs
Today, I invited my boyfriend to come to an event to meet some of my friends for the first time. I had been raving about him for weeks, and everyone was curious to meet this "amazing guy" I'd been dating. He showed up in a Darth Vader costume because he thought it would be funny to embarrass me. FML
by JJLight / 05/26/2013 at 11:14pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML
by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Work
Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML
by Anonymous / 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm / Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla) / Intimacy
Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML
by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, I got a new cat. It was fine for a couple of hours until it gave birth in my kitchen. The seller claims to have no idea that it was pregnant. Now I have to take care of 7 cats instead of 2. FML
by catcraze / 05/20/2013 at 7:23pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals
by Anonymous / 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by asdffhhjk / 05/15/2013 at 4:08am / Philippines (Manila) / Miscellaneous
by tdrtnlz / 05/11/2013 at 2:25am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love
Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML
by the girl next door / 05/07/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML
by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by obnum / 04/18/2013 at 10:37am / United States / Love
by my dumb bro / 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm / United States (Arkansas) / Kids
by fucklife / 04/16/2013 at 2:13pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Love
by Gurior / 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm / Canada / Intimacy
- Today, I was talking with my slightly skinflint girlfriend, who just moved in with me. “I think you… Today, a young woman on the subway asked me to hold her pocket mirror open in front of her. I asked… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.…