chelzy

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chelzy

20Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5269
  • Number of comments : 180
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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chelzy's page activity

Visits<b>Helldemon</b> - the 12/01/2016 at 11:31pm<b>TexanZaros</b> - the 11/26/2016 at 9:28am<b>datechnerd</b> - the 11/25/2016 at 9:57am<b>evbu98</b> - the 10/28/2016 at 1:14am<b>Lct1196</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 9:47am<b>Willman757</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 5:35pm<b>yenze</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 3:48am<b>littlebuck84</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 4:59pm<b>ebroks</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 6:59am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 1:50pm<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 6:52am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 4:29pm<b>whatahatuis</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 12:14pm<b>Sunflora219</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 12:53am<b>Fertil14</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 7:09pm<b>am1717</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 8:16pm<b>Azurexorcist</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 9:46am<b>ItzMarsh</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 5:13pm

Fucked!<b>Helldemon</b> - the 12/01/2016 at 9:20pm<b>datechnerd</b> - the 11/25/2016 at 3:57pm<b>Willman757</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 11:35pm<b>littlebuck84</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 10:59pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 7:50pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 10:29pm<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:50am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 4:12am<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:36pm<b>cheyyeee</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:23am<b>rjc490</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 3:59am<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 8:00pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 8:26pm<b>duffmani</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 4:39am<b>Sansa</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:50am<b>G00N3R</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 12:32am<b>thereichart</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 10:19pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 8:20pm

chelzy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

chelzy's favorite FMLs

Today, while showering, my 3 year old son comes to the bathroom and puts on all my makeup. Once I got out of the shower, I got a camera I had and took a few adorable shots. Afterward, I sent the images to all my friends and family. Then I realized the reflection on the mirror was me fully naked. FML

by heytherexo / 04/04/2009 at 10:10pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I went and got a spray on tan. I forgot to push the hair cap up. A few hours later, I was completely tan, except for the top half of my forehead was pasty white. It will last for five days. FML

Today, my friends and me had a little water balloon fight and somehow it led to throwing water balloons at cars. We all decided to hit a car all at once, after one came by we all hit it. The car stopped and started flashing bright blue lights. We ended up hitting an off-duty police car. FML

by AzNFoo / 03/26/2009 at 1:20am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I heard my boyfriend of 3 months talking with his friend, not knowing I could hear them. "Tonight's the night," my boyfriend says. "I'm finally going to tell her I love her!" I got really excited, deciding i loved him too. Then his friend says, "Awesome! But what about Kayla?" I'm Kayla. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2009 at 1:14pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I was at lunch with my grandpa and my sister. My grandpa looks over at my sister and says, "Wow. You're so beautiful." Right after, he turns to me and says, "And you have a nice coat." FML

by al0406 / 03/21/2009 at 8:34pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, our school had tryouts for chorus. Everybody sang a snippet of the song together until the teacher stopped us, saying it sounded awful. He singled me out and told me to sing alone. After I sang the part, he said, "Son, your gift to God will be silence." FML

by Sebastian / 03/17/2009 at 7:06pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had one of the worst panic attacks in years. I was worried nobody cared about me and that I had completely messed up my life. I was hyperventilating and crying hysterically. My mom walked by my room, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make those noises, at least shut the door." FML

by Screwed / 03/15/2009 at 11:38pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "how did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?". She yelled from the other room, "you know that little plate with the red stripe". I was eating off of it. FML

by imfullthanks / 03/14/2009 at 7:06pm / Norway (Oslo) / Health

Today, I called off work saying my Great Grandmother died. A co-worker texted me later asking where and when the funeral was. I made up a lie and said some random funeral home and date. My co-workers sent flowers to the funeral home for condolences. The flowers were returned. FML

by Whatever01 / 03/09/2009 at 11:32pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I called off work saying my Great Grandmother died. A co-worker texted me later asking where and when the funeral was. I made up a lie and said some random funeral home and date. My co-workers sent flowers to the funeral home for condolences. The flowers were returned. FML

by Whatever01 / 03/09/2009 at 11:32pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I went to my guidance counselor and told her how I'd been fascinated with space since I was 12, had read about the universe and everything, and how I want to be an astrologist when I grow up. She stared at me for a second, before saying, "But you're... stupid." FML

by astroloser / 03/07/2009 at 11:10am / Philippines (Rizal) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were being driven home from our date by her mother. She's Jewish and I'm Catholic. Her mother was talking about how my girlfriend was going on a trip to Jerusalem that summer. She finished with "And you can find a nice Jewish boy while you're there." FML

by Not Jewish / 03/02/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went to Tiffany's to exchange a bracelet my boyfriend had given me for our year anniversary. It was the first gift that he actually spent money on me for. The sales lady then told me that the bracelet was not a real Tiffany's item. FML

by Noname / 03/02/2009 at 2:24am / United States (California) / Money

Today, to ask a boy I really liked to my school's turnabout dance, I gave him a box full of 10 cupcakes that spelled out T-U-R-N-A-B-O-U-T-?. The boy gave the box back a little later. There were two cupcakes left inside. It said N-O. FML

by justanaccount / 02/27/2009 at 2:35pm / Spain (Madrid) / Miscellaneous