About cattturine : My name is Catherine and I sleep a lot.
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cattturine's favorite FMLs
by cassieleigh1 / 11/05/2015 at 12:05am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
by moonbears / 10/22/2015 at 12:46pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/27/2015 at 12:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML
by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" / 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/23/2015 at 9:58am / United States / Love
Today, my mom booked a family trip to Sweden. This would be great, if she hadn't asked me to tell our former German exchange student that we were coming to visit her in Germany. She was thrilled. Now I have to be the one to let her down. FML
by Blöde Gans / 11/25/2014 at 11:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by That_Indian_Guy / 11/15/2014 at 8:25am / United States (Florida) / Work
by SelfServiced / 11/02/2014 at 8:31pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by failure / 11/02/2014 at 3:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 11:47am / United States (Virginia) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML
by Operation Yewtree here I come / 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…