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Offline (the 08/08/2016 at 7:55am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 13 September 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1403
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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carliflowerr's page activity

Visits<b>tin_cup</b> - the 10/10/2016 at 5:22pm<b>Jay18</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 4:36pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 12:24am<b>LetsGetFreaky</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 9:30pm<b>zeusnewman09</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 1:28pm<b>sandman676</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 5:02pm<b>BarthConnor425</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 1:58am<b>zacharyd650</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 5:38pm<b>Emanpirate68</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 11:15pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 3:45pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:15am<b>Beccag7</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 9:39am<b>marshm610</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 9:35am<b>vandyboy97</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 11:24pm<b>Jaybob98</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 12:51pm<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 5:33pm<b>thomasrasmussen7</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:19pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:36pm

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 4:55am<b>sandman676</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 4:58am<b>thomasrasmussen7</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 8:11pm<b>patrickeli</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 1:21am<b>MrCareless</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:56am

carliflowerr's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

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I like your style

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See all of carliflowerr's badges

carliflowerr's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to overcome my shyness by warmly greeting the bus driver while entering it. I instead blurted out really loudly the words of the song my iPod was playing. FML

by OzzyWannabee / 02/20/2015 at 3:12am / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom and I went to exchange a massive stuffed animal, which was meant for my niece. I was carrying it when I saw a really hot guy looking at me funny. My mom snickered and told him that I never go anywhere without "George". FML

by thanks a lot mom / 12/28/2014 at 1:52am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a first date with a guy, I spilled ice cream all over my pants. He bought me some more, and as I was thanking him, he said, "You've never had a guy treat you right, have you?" I said no and started crying. FML

by Soulara89 / 12/22/2014 at 8:28pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, since my finals are starting tomorrow, I made a joke about setting my math books on fire. I laughed. Friends laughed. Parents laughed. Guess what subject just managed to actually get in touch with my scented candles? FML

by not laughing anymore / 12/11/2014 at 2:55pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

by WickedLittleDoll / 12/01/2014 at 11:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

by Purple / 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, after my shower, I went to clear off my fogged-up mirror. Doing so, I noticed a handprint on it. I compared it to my hand, but it was much too small. I live alone. FML

by spooked / 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

by subduedbeast / 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm / United States / Love

Today, I got in an argument with my teacher for always comparing me to my sister that she had a few years before. After I said, "I'm not my sister so please stop comparing me to her," she responded, "Of course you're not your sister, I actually like your sister." FML

by Not so much of a teachers pet / 10/22/2014 at 4:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend for touching up, but unfortunately we had a major argument recently. I guess that's why in the photos I've been photoshopped out and replaced with a goat. FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2014 at 1:37pm / United States (Texas) / Geek

Today, while on vacation, my parents called to inform me that my best friend had died in a car accident. Why? To trick me into tearfully confessing my love for him. It worked. FML

by whywouldyoudothat / 10/06/2014 at 9:14pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

by oncehipjr / 10/03/2014 at 3:04pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML

by Anonyme / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / France (Lorraine) / Animals