Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

captain_nick

Offline (the 12/21/2015 at 8:27am) | Search for a member

captain_nick

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 January 1935 (81 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 828
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

captain_nick's page activity

Visits<b>firefox9778</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 3:07pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 9:18am<b>FreshDonuts</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 3:42pm<b>cm1995</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:05pm<b>AaronFors</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 8:55am<b>Accurate_Vision</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 9:13am<b>shupwhup</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 8:01pm<b>ellymae96</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 8:54pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:45am<b>lilmissy44</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 3:13pm<b>jcshadow</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 9:06pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 7:30pm<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 10:40pm<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 9:15am<b>tjdrummer</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 10:50pm<b>ana_lee_bonde</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 3:30pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 3:10pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 12:36pm

Fucked!<b>ellymae96</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 2:54am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 12:30am

captain_nick's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of captain_nick's badges

captain_nick's favorite FMLs

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34319) - you deserved it (16075)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, in college, we were asked at what age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML

#21259479
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40491) - you deserved it (9073)

On 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I baked a strawberry cake and I didn't have any fresh strawberries for garnish, so I used a can of strawberry pie filling. My neighbors said it looked like the cake was taken from the dumpster behind an abortion clinic. FML

#21146042
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43981) - you deserved it (8514)

On 05/20/2014 at 5:54am - misc - by sothishappened (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

#20857611
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44450) - you deserved it (5220)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:33am - kids - by Alice (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64915) - you deserved it (9789)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: