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Offline (the 06/13/2015 at 4:40am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1750
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About capt_awesome1 : I reject your reality and substitute my own!

capt_awesome1's page activity

Visits<b>smokeduck115</b> - the 12/01/2016 at 8:10am<b>alex_gen</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 4:40am<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 10/09/2016 at 1:35am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 10:25pm<b>rissamarie</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 5:32pm<b>lungjiao</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 12:39pm<b>NNOTCHO</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 8:18pm<b>raven83</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 10:12am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 3:08pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 4:19pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 6:35pm<b>turdwrangler</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 11:09am<b>fishbones100</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 8:32am<b>teenagedropout</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 10:56pm<b>rivimatt</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 5:40pm<b>muarif</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:04am<b>Kaoticwolf</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 6:46pm<b>DaFisch</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 12:31pm

Fucked!<b>alex_gen</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 10:40am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 9:09pm<b>paravoz</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 8:20am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 1:54pm

capt_awesome1's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of capt_awesome1's badges

capt_awesome1's favorite FMLs

Today, my best friend decided to start dating my ex. We broke up yesterday. She also thinks I'm crazy because I'm upset about it. FML

by effyou / 02/10/2011 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk. As he got home he asked me to marry him, I was going to say yes until he said, "Oh wait, wrong woman." FML

by em / 02/05/2011 at 4:32am / United Kingdom (North East Lincolnshire) / Love

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

by theish / 02/04/2011 at 9:08am / Intimacy

Today, this guy I have a huge crush on came with me to my house to study. I was warmly welcomed by my drunken mother laying naked on the floor. FML

by madelynn / 01/30/2011 at 9:03pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my best friend who I've known since high school is getting married. I'm supposed to give a toast during the reception about how great the bride and groom are. I've been sleeping with the groom for the past 7 months. FML

by Emily / 08/03/2010 at 7:54pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy

Today, a friend of mine and I were talking about how hygienic we are. She mentioned she hadn't shaved her downstairs in a while. I was looking at the computer when she said this so when I turned to look at her I saw she had pulled down her pants and underwear. I was face to face with hairy muff. FML

by roxyriley / 12/07/2009 at 4:30am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, it was my birthday. My parents came into my room at 12:01 to surprise me. Do you know what fifteen year olds do at midnight? FML

by urmommmm / 08/22/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service for Passover), my mom served matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options for me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shouted, "I like really big balls!" in front of my entire family. FML

by anon13 / 04/12/2009 at 12:27am / United States (New York) / Intimacy