About capt_awesome1 : I reject your reality and substitute my own!
capt_awesome1's FML badges
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
capt_awesome1's favorite FMLs
by effyou / 02/10/2011 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Love
by em / 02/05/2011 at 4:32am / United Kingdom (North East Lincolnshire) / Love
by madelynn / 01/30/2011 at 9:03pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my best friend who I've known since high school is getting married. I'm supposed to give a toast during the reception about how great the bride and groom are. I've been sleeping with the groom for the past 7 months. FML
by Emily / 08/03/2010 at 7:54pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
Today, a friend of mine and I were talking about how hygienic we are. She mentioned she hadn't shaved her downstairs in a while. I was looking at the computer when she said this so when I turned to look at her I saw she had pulled down her pants and underwear. I was face to face with hairy muff. FML
by roxyriley / 12/07/2009 at 4:30am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by urmommmm / 08/22/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service for Passover), my mom served matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options for me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shouted, "I like really big balls!" in front of my entire family. FML
by anon13 / 04/12/2009 at 12:27am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
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- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…