borderlineasian

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Offline (the 02/05/2016 at 5:02am)

borderlineasian

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 332
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About borderlineasian : Just trying to get through high school.

borderlineasian's page activity

Visits<b>drdeathdefy</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 6:37pm<b>cnator</b> - the 08/24/2012 at 4:19pm<b>bellesa_mexicana</b> - the 03/21/2012 at 10:29pm<b>misaet</b> - the 01/07/2012 at 11:51pm

borderlineasian's FML badges

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borderlineasian's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom made a Facebook post about me starting my period and for everyone to be nice to me. FML

by ColoredPencil13 / 05/10/2014 at 9:35am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

by nosestealer / 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I witnessed an elderly lady getting mugged. I ran over to the guy mugging her and offered him the money in my wallet in return for him leaving her alone. The old lady snatched my money and ran away with the mugger. What the hell just happened? FML

by No money, mo' problems / 06/18/2013 at 6:01pm / United States / Money

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Love

Today, my dad came out of jail. He showed me his tattoo of a bible on his chest with all his 13 kids' names on it. I'm the only one whose name is spelled wrong. FML

by XoxoChula / 03/22/2013 at 1:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML

by Ian Artis / 07/12/2012 at 2:28pm / United States / Work

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

by Jobby / 06/30/2012 at 8:48am / Health

Today, I was operating on a young girl, when she began to awaken during the surgery. We quickly put her back under, of course, but now I'm terrified that she'll remember my profuse cursing and get me in the shit with my curmudgeonly killjoy of a boss. FML

by Anonymous / 06/03/2012 at 4:27pm / United States / Work

Today, my son asked me for advice over his girlfriend not "respecting" his pathetic need for near-constant sex. I got so bored listening to the misogynistic horse-shit spewing out of his mouth that I totally zoned out. I came to as he started hurling abuse at me for not siding with him. FML

by Alfie4 / 03/05/2012 at 5:30pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy

Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML

by thefrightening1 / 09/05/2011 at 11:03am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking to school. I started running to catch up with my friend. I yelled her name, and she turned around in time to watch me slip on a sheet of ice, fall face first, and pass out. When she ran to my side, I unconsciously peed on her. FML

by anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 11:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

by Username / 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm / Kids

Today, it dawned on me that the most romantic thing my husband has done in the last three years, was a put a wedding ring on his xbox avatar. FML

by browniepoints / 02/06/2010 at 7:09pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had a surgery to remove a cyst from my butt. Afterwards that doctor told me that the cyst was bigger than he initially thought, it would still secrete fluids for two weeks, and the best remedy for this was to wear a maxi-pad. I'm a guy, and am currently wearing a maxi-pad on my butt. FML

by Ian / 04/18/2009 at 10:24am / United States (Ohio) / Health