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bmba94

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bmba94

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bmba94
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8967
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bmba94's page activity

Visits<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:50pm<b>SadSouthernBell</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:45pm<b>tamesenicole</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:31pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 10:45pm<b>dariboy</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:41pm<b>FrontRowSquad</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:14pm<b>mif</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:39pm<b>purpleturtle16</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:32am<b>Yarecho</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 5:40pm<b>Scheffy213</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:24pm<b>MissEris</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:41am<b>sweatynate</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 2:01pm<b>NeyNeyDaDa</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 1:20pm<b>honeymoonroyale</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 12:02am<b>fifi125</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 3:19pm<b>sashakotlik</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:31pm<b>eyebrowzzz</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 8:55am<b>hallieee</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:31pm

Fucked!<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:41am

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bmba94's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy I've been seeing for a few months told me he couldn't stay overnight because his mom would yell at him for not coming home. We're both 30 and I didn't know he still lived at home. FML

#21350278
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30963) - you deserved it (3591)

On 02/05/2015 at 11:42am - love - by thenewgirl29 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my professor cancelled class so I turned off my alarm. When I woke up, I checked my email again. There was no email from my professor. It was a dream. FML

#21350106
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39452) - you deserved it (5542)

On 02/05/2015 at 1:15am - misc - by DreamsDontComeTrue - United States (Virginia)

Today, my date dropped me off at home and briefly met my parents. As he was leaving he whispered into my ear, "I want to feel the inside of your vagina with the outside of my penis." My parents totally heard. FML

#21349904
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37251) - you deserved it (4225)

On 02/04/2015 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by MIB thingy please... (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I called my boss a "fucking retard" for doing something insanely stupid, only for him to find out 5 minutes later that I did exactly the same thing. I'll never hear the end of this now. FML

Today, my fiancée told me about her new diet. Apparently, she is only going to drink water and tan in a tanning bed so she can photosynthesise. She thinks this will help her lose weight, since she doesn't have to eat anything. I'm dating a dumbass. FML

Today, I discovered my elderly neighbour likes to roam around his yard naked and wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in my kitchen again. FML

#21349488
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30002) - you deserved it (2435)

On 02/04/2015 at 2:44am - misc - by Sprinkles (man) - Australia

Today, I shaved for the first time. My mum gave me a razor and I spent about 20 minutes trying to use it. I gave up, yelling, "FUCK IT!" and put it back on the shelf. It fell, and as it hit the floor, a lid fell off. I'd tried to shave with a sheathed razor for 20 minutes. FML

#21349366
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14642) - you deserved it (38277)

On 02/03/2015 at 10:45pm - health - by februarymarchapril (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

#21349028
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34430) - you deserved it (2332)

On 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)

Today, as I passed by the window that looks out on to my front yard, I saw a man out there so I ran to the kitchen to call the police. The operator asked me to describe the man. It was then that I realized the mysterious man in my yard was the snowman I built yesterday. FML

#21348837
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16033) - you deserved it (29390)

On 02/03/2015 at 2:50am - misc - by anon - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to give me a naked massage. She straddled my back and started rubbing, then she sneezed and peed on me. FML

#21348755
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40434) - you deserved it (4180)

On 02/02/2015 at 11:36pm - love - by bootyislife - United States (Washington)

Today, I witnessed a man masturbate into a public urinal, miss, fart, and then leave without washing his hands. FML

#21347895
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31285) - you deserved it (2295)

On 02/01/2015 at 6:10pm - health - by grossedout - United States (Virginia)

Today, my Breaking Bad obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks." during foreplay. My vagina just about turned into a desert on the spot. FML

#21347719
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30344) - you deserved it (3301)

On 02/01/2015 at 11:17am - intimacy - by SKYYYLLLARRRR!!!! (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

#21347104
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27682) - you deserved it (2891)

On 01/31/2015 at 12:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my beloved dog. Why? Yesterday she asked me who I'd choose, and I honestly said that I would choose the dog. FML

Today, I felt a painful lump on my jaw. After going on Google, I was convinced I either had an infected tooth or jaw cancer. In a panic, I rushed to the dentist and told the receptionist the problem. She pulled the dentist from an appointment, and he felt around my jaw. It was just a pimple. FML

#21346970
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13995) - you deserved it (24354)

On 01/30/2015 at 7:11pm - health - by not a cancerous pimple - United States (Pennsylvania)



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