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bmba94

Offline (the 02/17/2015 at 1:19am) | Search for a member

bmba94

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bmba94
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6726
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bmba94's page activity

Visits<b>purpleturtle16</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:32am<b>Yarecho</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 5:40pm<b>kjax</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 4:23pm<b>Scheffy213</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:24pm<b>MissEris</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:41am<b>sweatynate</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 2:01pm<b>NeyNeyDaDa</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 1:20pm<b>honeymoonroyale</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 12:02am<b>fifi125</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 3:19pm<b>sashakotlik</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:31pm<b>eyebrowzzz</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 8:55am<b>hallieee</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:31pm<b>MissyPastaCreeps</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 11:08pm<b>pinkgreenyellow</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 3:09pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:00pm<b>avecave99</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:22pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:16am<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 5:53pm

Liked!<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:41am

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bmba94's favorite FMLs

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML

#21286497
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27733) - you deserved it (11602)

On 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm - health - by lady parts - United States (Illinois)

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

#21286332
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49204) - you deserved it (3475)

On 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by subduedbeast - United States

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32699) - you deserved it (4564)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, there was a laundry basket of my clothes sitting in my room. My dad asked me if they were clean or not. When I said I didn't know, he picked up a piece of my clothing, sniffed it, and said it smelled fine. That piece of clothing just so happened to be my underwear. FML

#21285867
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28420) - you deserved it (5340)

On 10/26/2014 at 8:05pm - misc - by socreepedouticanteven - United States (West Virginia)

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

#21285821
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35866) - you deserved it (3961)

On 10/26/2014 at 6:46pm - love - by mellielynnemily - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to give my boyfriend a blowjob. Barely 20 seconds in, he said: "I'll be honest, this is TERRIBLE." FML

#21285558
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40332) - you deserved it (8671)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:25am - intimacy - by soisblueballsdickhead (woman) - United States

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

#21285546
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33376) - you deserved it (4537)

On 10/26/2014 at 9:54am - kids - by Bob H. (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, as I was laying in bed in my dark room, with only my phone's light on, a huge moth flew around it and directly into my open mouth. FML

#21285341
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29575) - you deserved it (5057)

On 10/25/2014 at 11:47pm - misc - by j_portal - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my brother got upset at his video game and flung his DS at the wall, just as I was walking by. I got knocked out to the sound of someone crossing the finish line in MarioKart. FML

#21285323
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31599) - you deserved it (2521)

On 10/25/2014 at 11:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the police station to find out if the tint on my new car's windshield was too dark. The officer took one look, told me that windshield tints are illegal in California, and ticketed me. So much for being honest. FML

#21285139
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31874) - you deserved it (8522)

On 10/25/2014 at 5:58pm - misc - by tanisLX - United States (California)

Today, let's just say it's not always a good idea to storm into your mum's bedroom after hearing several loud slaps accompanied by yelps. What sounds like domestic violence might just be your mum and step-dad's foreplay. For Christ's sake, I need brain bleach. FML

#21285126
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35158) - you deserved it (7789)

On 10/25/2014 at 5:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

#21285040
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33772) - you deserved it (5415)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out what it's like to drive seven hours home with a woman who just brutally rejected your marriage proposal. FML

#21284911
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42613) - you deserved it (3492)

On 10/25/2014 at 10:10am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37438) - you deserved it (10947)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I got approached by a lady while eating at a fast-food restaurant who asked if I could spare five dollars. Confidently, I pulled out my wallet to show her that I had no cash, only to reveal a perfectly crisp five dollar bill that I had completely forgotten about. FML

#21284180
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28689) - you deserved it (15161)

On 10/24/2014 at 1:02am - money - by Yeah (man) - United States (Texas)



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