Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bmba94

Online | Search for a member

bmba94

5Fucked!

bmba94
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11589
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

bmba94's page activity

Visits<b>FitFriday</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 3:01am<b>chilldude69</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:18pm<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:24am<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:11am<b>YBae</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 8:41pm<b>Mae342</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 1:55am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 2:37pm<b>XxNekoLovexX</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 5:23pm<b>Krystal3408</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 4:01pm<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:50pm<b>SadSouthernBell</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:45pm<b>tamesenicole</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:31pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 10:45pm<b>dariboy</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:41pm<b>FrontRowSquad</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:14pm<b>mif</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:39pm<b>purpleturtle16</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 7:32am<b>Yarecho</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 5:40pm

Fucked!<b>FitFriday</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:54am<b>YBae</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 2:41am<b>Mae342</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 7:55am<b>Krystal3408</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 10:01pm<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:41am

bmba94's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of bmba94's badges

bmba94's favorite FMLs

Today, I was helping out during the school play's interval. My head of year jokingly asked me to follow him around with these mini cocktail sausages for the rest of the school year. I thought it would be witty to reply, "Does that make me your official sausage holder?" FML

#21378332
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25038) - you deserved it (84)

On 03/20/2015 at 10:41am - love - by MirandaJones (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after telling my parents that I want to be a vegetarian, I got grounded. Apparently, "black people can't be vegetarians" and, I'm "crazy for even suggesting something like that." FML

#21378047
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32330) - you deserved it (4622)

On 03/19/2015 at 10:23pm - misc - by shawnsmuffins - United States (Florida)

Today, my maths class and I had to sit through a slideshow of photos of our teacher's cat. The cat's name is Mr Cat. FML

#21376941
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (235) - you deserved it (27)

On 03/18/2015 at 5:44am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my brother wore a T-shirt to my birthday party that said "I dig skinny chicks". I'm a recovering anorexic and told him that I didn't really like his shirt. His response? "Don't let the liberal media brainwash you into thinking it's OK to be fat." FML

#21376642
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32504) - you deserved it (4217)

On 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm - misc - by Idigrespectfulattire (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, my boss insisted I go in front of him up the stairs. Out of respect, I insisted he go first. After a few seconds of back and forth insisting, he went. The reason he wanted me to go first was because he had to fart. I inhaled the raunchy gas for over three flights of stairs. FML

#21376143
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26692) - you deserved it (11379)

On 03/17/2015 at 2:12am - work - by Boss Troubles - United States (California)

Today, my mom and I made the bad decision to go hiking for some mother-daughter bonding even though we had little experience. My mother tumbled down a mountain named Tumbledown and I couldn't even enjoy the irony because I had to half carry her all the way back to the car. FML

#21375957
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27645) - you deserved it (3302)

On 03/16/2015 at 8:56pm - health - by manderpander21 - United States (New York)

Today, while walking my dog, we came across two men having a heated argument in the street. My dog decided the perfect place to poop was right next to them. He wouldn't budge no matter what. Meanwhile, one of the men pulled a knife, and I practically shat myself. FML

#21374140
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29720) - you deserved it (2444)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, my mother in law accidentally cc'd me on an email she was sending to my husband, telling him that his youth is fleeting and that he should leave me while he still has time. FML

#21373326
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30292) - you deserved it (2194)

On 03/12/2015 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss told me I got my new job because she rejected candidates that seemed "too confident" or "too pretty." FML

#21373118
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92) - you deserved it (2330)

On 03/12/2015 at 12:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went running. I live in a small town and people know me fairly well. It was dark when I went to avoid the heat. I was almost finished with my run when the cop comes up and asks me what I'm running from. Clearly being fat and out of shape is not a good enough alibi. FML

#21372790
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30570) - you deserved it (2354)

On 03/11/2015 at 9:50pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while discussing my grades with my mother, she told me that when she was my age she was dumb but hardworking, and my dad was lazy but very smart. She then added, "You managed to get the worst out of each of us." FML

#21372077
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28483) - you deserved it (3150)

On 03/10/2015 at 8:19pm - misc - by Daughter of the year - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (347) - you deserved it (48751)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her "Hey, is this Stephanie?" I got response saying "Sorry bro, I know how you feel, she did the same thing to me." FML

#21371084
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36266) - you deserved it (3091)

On 03/09/2015 at 9:55am - love - by generic_name123 - United States (District of Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: