bmba94

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Offline (the 09/06/2016 at 2:09pm)

bmba94

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bmba94
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 September 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 18471
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bmba94's page activity

Visits<b>df21312</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 11:50am<b>BirdMockingBlack</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 2:06pm<b>leigh_xx</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 10:57pm<b>Miss_Chevious</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 9:50pm<b>TheNoNameGuy</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:01am<b>StaceeeP</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 8:18pm<b>nickie_94</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 8:04am<b>Technastar</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 5:39am<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 9:04am<b>Litarius</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 7:15pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 1:55pm<b>Big_Bawws</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 12:49pm<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 1:55pm<b>k_lylepad</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 2:55pm<b>trellz17</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 11:23am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 3:01am<b>chilldude69</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:18pm<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:24am

Fucked!<b>df21312</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 5:50pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 7:55pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:54am<b>YBae</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 2:41am<b>Mae342</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 7:55am<b>Krystal3408</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 10:01pm<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:41am

bmba94's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of bmba94's badges

bmba94's favorite FMLs

Today, I got fired from my part-time job, because I insisted on keeping my phone in my pocket and never using it, instead of putting it in locker without a lock or security camera, that anyone can go through. The manager found out by searching my locker for the past 3 weeks. Ironic. FML

by Chesty Larue / 08/06/2015 at 8:29pm / United States / Work

Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was so incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2015 at 8:54pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I was at work at a supermarket straightening shelves in the food aisles. Just as I had finished and got ready to clock out, I heard a giant crash. A lady in a motor scooter knocked over an entire aisle of canned goods. She got up and walked away just fine, pretending nothing happened. FML

by acidonymous / 07/09/2015 at 12:32am / United States (Michigan) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my 5-year-old won't stop princess-waving at people. This would be fine, but she looks exactly like she is giving the Nazi salute. I got dirty looks from nearly everyone at the supermarket. FML

by momoftheyearedition / 07/08/2015 at 11:13pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML

by welpwelpwelp / 07/08/2015 at 1:45pm / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Love

Today, while visiting family in Taipei, I came across a large button that said "PUSH" on it. I was curious and pushed it. A deafening alarm then sounded for the next 10 minutes, attracting concerned neighbours and finally a security guard who informed me that I'd pushed a panic button. FML

by whoops / 07/08/2015 at 12:30pm / Taiwan / Holidays

Today, I told my boyfriend how my mom died when I was 11 after crashing her car into a tree at night. He muttered "Women drivers." FML

Today, I guest-played as a catcher for a new fastpitch softball team. After the first couple of innings, the batter fouled a ball back into my catcher's mask. As a concussion test, the coach asked me what her name was. I decided to fake the concussion rather than admit that I'd forgotten her name. FML

by Softball / 07/08/2015 at 9:58am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, while waiting the required 5 minutes for my hair removal cream to work, my cat rubbed all over my legs while I wasn't looking. After getting clawed to death throwing her in the bath to get the cream off, all her hair on that side fell off. I now have a half hairless cat. FML

by coolcat10156 / 07/08/2015 at 3:04am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I had to sit through an entire movie where every time a new character was introduced, the guy sitting behind me would say, "My name is Jeff." FML

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

by notacreep / 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my extremely religious mom ranted at me, saying I'd only bought an electric toothbrush so I could masturbate with it. I'm a guy. FML

by but cum to think of it... / 07/03/2015 at 5:29pm / Intimacy

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

by Anonymous / 07/03/2015 at 4:51pm / United States / Kids

Today, my flight was at the other side of the airport. I ran to the gate, to find that the flight had moved to the other side of the airport. So I ran again to miss my plane by a minute. However I did get a new flight... at the other end of the airport. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2015 at 3:09pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I spent nearly half an hour looking for my favourite pair of shoes. I ended up getting so pissed off that I accused my boyfriend of stealing them. He then pointed out that I was wearing them. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2015 at 1:54pm / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Miscellaneous