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bmba94

Offline (the 02/21/2015 at 8:59am) | Search for a member

bmba94

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bmba94
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7281
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bmba94's page activity

Visits<b>hallieee</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 12:31pm<b>MissyPastaCreeps</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 11:08pm<b>pinkgreenyellow</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 3:09pm<b>fifi125</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 5:55am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:00pm<b>avecave99</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 1:22pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:16am<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 5:53pm<b>swanheart</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 2:10am<b>daffyduck16</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 9:17pm<b>hobbs96</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 6:36am<b>UhHuhHoney</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 2:11am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 8:31pm<b>FanofGames</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 11:33pm<b>noctali_Solstice</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 12:29am<b>singer0421</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 12:00am<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 10:40pm<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 5:13pm

Liked!<b>BloodyDemon</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:41am

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bmba94's favorite FMLs

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

#21347104
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26931) - you deserved it (2593)

On 01/31/2015 at 12:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my beloved dog. Why? Yesterday she asked me who I'd choose, and I honestly said that I would choose the dog. FML

Today, I felt a painful lump on my jaw. After going on Google, I was convinced I either had an infected tooth or jaw cancer. In a panic, I rushed to the dentist and told the receptionist the problem. She pulled the dentist from an appointment, and he felt around my jaw. It was just a pimple. FML

#21346970
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13380) - you deserved it (23574)

On 01/30/2015 at 7:11pm - health - by not a cancerous pimple - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. Turns out his dad is the asshole customer that I complain about all the time. He recognized me too and spent the entire dinner making passive-aggressive remarks about how bad of an employee I am. FML

#21345967
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29628) - you deserved it (2614)

On 01/29/2015 at 12:39am - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a job interview at a café. The interviewer asked me my availability and I told her that I was fully flexible. She laughed and said, "Really? That's tragic." FML

#21345516
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25553) - you deserved it (2251)

On 01/28/2015 at 8:09am - work - by tipmeover (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML

#21343273
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30094) - you deserved it (4614)

On 01/24/2015 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I witnessed my husband in the shower singing Chicago's "You're the Inspiration" to his penis while manscaping. I guess that's a bond we'll never have. FML

#21342844
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26502) - you deserved it (3203)

On 01/23/2015 at 11:46am - intimacy - by LD - United States (Idaho)

Today, I let out a monstrous fart at the gym. They said it didn't even sound human. FML

#21341250
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27380) - you deserved it (6081)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:41pm - misc - by highschoolsucks - United States

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30335) - you deserved it (4248)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah... I think we're done with that. FML

#21340673
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28946) - you deserved it (3494)

On 01/19/2015 at 11:42pm - intimacy - by BDSM4Jesus - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my crush was giving me a ride home. As we pulled up to my house, he looked into my eyes with a sweet smile and said the words every girl wants to hear - "Do you give head?" FML

#21339980
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35324) - you deserved it (5290)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:35am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that every single picture that I have ever sent to my boyfriend, his father has also received. Every. Single. One. FML

#21337935
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23791) - you deserved it (25934)

On 01/15/2015 at 10:43pm - love - by everysingleone - United States

Today, I learned that when a man in the row in front of you at a movie theater tells you to shut up, you shouldn't tell him to fuck off. He might be 6'4 with a short temper. FML

#21337906
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13841) - you deserved it (44411)

On 01/15/2015 at 10:15pm - misc - by whoops.. (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I gambled on a fart and lost. FML

#21337828
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23539) - you deserved it (15091)

On 01/15/2015 at 8:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my husband bought me XL pajamas for my birthday. I got really angry, telling him that's obviously not my size. I tried them on just to show him how ridiculous they look. They fit. FML

#21336954
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21164) - you deserved it (36741)

On 01/14/2015 at 12:49pm - love - by middleagednurse - United States (Florida)



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