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bmba94's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
bmba94's favorite FMLs
by gorillalove / 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by onthemarket / 09/08/2010 at 3:46pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
by jrad / 09/08/2010 at 3:23pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals
Today, after a few months of my neighbors friend parking outside his house and honking until he came outside, I happened to be out doing lawn work. I politely screamed "STOP HONKING YOUR F***ING HORN!" To which they responded by moving in front of MY house and holding down their horn. I hate people. FML
by Myself / 09/06/2010 at 6:45am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/03/2010 at 4:51pm / United States (New York) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/03/2010 at 2:18am / United States (Arizona) / Money
by AmICrappyEveryOtherDay / 09/02/2010 at 7:51pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, my minivan broke down on the side of the highway. I'm out of work and can't afford a cell phone, so I resorted to standing at the back of my van holding a "HELP" sign. About an hour went by, in which time I was passed by a cop car, a firetruck, and a car that said "Roadside Assistance." FML
by Forded / 09/01/2010 at 7:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Transportation
by MisterMisinformed / 09/01/2010 at 12:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by teacher / 08/31/2010 at 10:50am / United States (Virginia) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML
by maebyf / 08/31/2010 at 10:48am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by grossfoot / 08/31/2010 at 2:14am / United States (New York) / Transportation
Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML
by tikizombie / 08/30/2010 at 8:04pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend was talking with his friends about how long girls take to get ready (hair, make-up, etc.). I said, "I never spend a long time getting ready..." He then looked at me and said, "maybe you should." FML
by ILoveFML / 08/29/2010 at 10:14am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, my girlfriend asked me how big the Sun would be compared to the Earth. I didn't have anything on me to help demonstrate, so to imitate the Earth, I made a small hole with my index finger and thumb and said "Okay, imagine a ball this small." She then looked at my crotch. FML
by Anonymous / 08/27/2010 at 8:23am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy
- Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my… Today, since I'm too ashamed to go buy a proper sex toy, I used an old Star Wars toy sword instead.… Today, I was just taking a wank with my laptop on low battery. Almost finished when my laptop died.…