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bluegoldfish

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bluegoldfish
  • Town/Country : il tell you if you give me crack., bagelville
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1608
  • Number of comments : 225
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About bluegoldfish : You know whats nice? Cheese. Seriously, go out and buy some. Go on. Get off fml, step AWAY from the computer and go up to the shops and get yourself some cheese. Any old cheese will do. There are all different types. There's soft, squishy white cheese, or blue cheese, or yellowy orange cheese. You really can't go wrong. Sliced cheddar is pretty good. You can make sandwiches with it, toast it, microwave it and eat it out of a cup (no really you have to try this), anything. Its nice with vegemite. Its even got calcium and crap so animal fat aside its kind of healthy. And its yellow. Yellows a nice colour. Yellows the colour of giraffes. Which are also pretty cool. I would kill for those legs. Lucky bitches.

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bluegoldfish's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15868) - you deserved it (58096)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML

#16685518
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33760) - you deserved it (8661)

On 06/15/2011 at 10:42pm - misc - by missy - United States (Alaska)

Today, I was arrested for carrying a dangerous weapon. I was on my way home from the shop where I'd bought a new kitchen knife. FML

#16657844
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31099) - you deserved it (3066)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:47am - misc - by lalala (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I let my new puppy outside for the first time. When I went to get him, I saw a man running off with him. FML

#16651474
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43604) - you deserved it (10957)

On 06/13/2011 at 9:46pm - misc - by robertsonjimmy - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was at my friend's house, and I asked if I could try on one of her dresses. It was a little snug, but I got it on. When it came time to take it off though, it wouldn't budge. My friend and her mom had to cut it off me. FML

#16627798
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14375) - you deserved it (22202)

On 06/12/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Apple (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at my friend's house, and I asked if I could try on one of her dresses. It was a little snug, but I got it on. When it came time to take it off though, it wouldn't budge. My friend and her mom had to cut it off me. FML

#16627798
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14375) - you deserved it (22202)

On 06/12/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Apple (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while babysitting I decided to play with a children's puzzle to pass the time. Fifteen minutes in I gave up. The kid then came over and put it together in less than five. There were only ten pieces. FML

#16481636
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9348) - you deserved it (52603)

On 06/03/2011 at 10:04am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I was taken to my first session with my psychiatrist. The entirety of the facility, from the waiting room to the doc's office was decorated with dead butterflies in glass. I was there for my crippling mottephobia, the irrational fear of moths and butterflies. FML

#16478261
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37645) - you deserved it (3906)

On 06/03/2011 at 1:16am - health - by JefferyT (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52847) - you deserved it (4073)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was released from hospital after being in a car accident. I used the phone book to call people I know to get a ride home, as my wallet and cellphone were still in the wrecked car. I had called my mom to come get me, but her response was "I don't feel like it." I live with her. FML

#16464614
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29288) - you deserved it (2267)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:27am - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was released from hospital after being in a car accident. I used the phone book to call people I know to get a ride home, as my wallet and cellphone were still in the wrecked car. I had called my mom to come get me, but her response was "I don't feel like it." I live with her. FML

#16464614
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29288) - you deserved it (2267)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:27am - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61497) - you deserved it (3349)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my girlfriend and I were driving to a costume party. On the way, we got into an argument and she kicked me out of her car. I had to walk around the city center in an Iron Man outfit trying to find the party venue. FML

#16446584
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25355) - you deserved it (8394)

On 06/01/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by 2ndplacechamp - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I wrote in my own yearbook with different styles of handwriting so my mom would think I have friends. FML

#16445488
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44993) - you deserved it (11915)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:28am - misc - by nofriends - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, the girl I love made me text my best friend how much she loved him. This because her phone died. I was at the movies with her on our date. FML

#16382228
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34056) - you deserved it (5312)

On 05/28/2011 at 1:51am - love - by Fuckit - United States (Idaho)



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