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blueforevergirl

Offline (the 05/28/2015 at 12:52am) | Search for a member

blueforevergirl

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 444
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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blueforevergirl's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of blueforevergirl's badges

blueforevergirl's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML

#21243572
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49674) - you deserved it (4368)

On 08/23/2014 at 2:26am - intimacy - by confidence taken - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my son gave me some flowers for Mother's Day. Unfortunately, the only time I can enjoy them is when I go into the bathroom where they are kept so the cat doesn't eat them. FML

Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML

#20975537
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50717) - you deserved it (10873)

On 11/30/2013 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Jack - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments

Today, I'm staying with my in-laws. My husband is fighting with his dad, who's fighting with his brother-in-law, who's fighting with his wife. The only ones not fighting are my sister-in-law and her boyfriend, who're getting along great on a squeaky mattress in the room next to mine. FML

#20975413
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47502) - you deserved it (3745)

On 11/30/2013 at 12:58am - intimacy - by Thanksalot (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was rubbing one out in the shower. I guess I got a little too excited, because as I came close to climaxing, I had a serious asthma attack and had to wheeze for help. FML

#20975074
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46008) - you deserved it (11279)

On 11/29/2013 at 7:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to bail my husband out of jail. It turns out that in the Black Friday rush, he beat a guy up just so he could get his hands on the last of a heavily-discounted item. The item in question: a toaster. FML

#20975053
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40976) - you deserved it (3982)

On 11/29/2013 at 6:55pm - misc - by fleetingmemories (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I overheard my parents talking about me and discussing how I've never had a boyfriend. My mum laughed that maybe they should pay someone to go out with me, and my dad replied, "Heh, not enough money in the world." FML

#20974977
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49924) - you deserved it (3940)

On 11/29/2013 at 5:27pm - love - by katerina (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML

#20974953
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25681) - you deserved it (38351)

On 11/29/2013 at 4:49pm - love - by holy sleet (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to my first job interview in months. Just minutes in, a sudden huge, uncontrollable sneeze overcame me. A wad of snot flew out onto my shirt, which I didn't even notice until the visibly disgusted interviewer pointed it out. FML

#20974690
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37816) - you deserved it (3410)

On 11/29/2013 at 1:08pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

#20974515
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59305) - you deserved it (6468)

On 11/29/2013 at 6:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mother posted a video of me giving birth, on Facebook. FML

#20974447
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57656) - you deserved it (4243)

On 11/29/2013 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

#20974338
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23714) - you deserved it (37608)

On 11/29/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

#20974086
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42505) - you deserved it (43665)

On 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by OuchImAMoron (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML

#20973886
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41592) - you deserved it (7715)

On 11/28/2013 at 5:03pm - work - by aaannnddd there goes my boner (man) - United Kingdom



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