Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

blackpuddle

Online | Search for a member

blackpuddle

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 September 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3493
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About blackpuddle : I like penguins.

blackpuddle's page activity

Visits<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:42pm<b>sLaShERR_17</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:21pm<b>TmaxxRuler</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 1:31pm<b>Juicenub</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 1:02pm<b>kaz55</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 12:01pm<b>MartyMcFlyy</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 3:41pm<b>FYlife604</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 12:47pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 12:12pm<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 1:53pm<b>suckmideck</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 9:52pm<b>Same_Heart</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 8:55pm<b>KayLynn135</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:03pm<b>imalosertho</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 7:22pm<b>Lalala579121</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 8:15pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 5:57pm<b>vernk</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 1:49pm<b>Jazzy9999</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 10:54pm<b>batah</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 3:14am

blackpuddle's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of blackpuddle's badges

blackpuddle's favorite FMLs

Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML

#21409928
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32642) - you deserved it (7090)

On 05/14/2015 at 8:42am - work - by HiddlePuff - Australia

Today, my window broke and will not close. My room is in a wooded area. I've already chased out two squirrels and a bird and it's only been an hour. I'm afraid I'm gonna wake up like Snow White with all sorts of wildlife sleeping with me. FML

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

#21369938
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33958) - you deserved it (3356)

On 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by killme (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

#21130670
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43160) - you deserved it (6164)

On 05/04/2014 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, out of boredom, I built my cat a little fort. Later, I decided to crawl inside to pet her, but as soon as I stuck my head in, she clawed me. I guess I'm not allowed in, then. FML

#21061796
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40885) - you deserved it (8901)

On 02/15/2014 at 7:50pm - animals - by unloved cat owner - United States (California)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43807) - you deserved it (13381)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment, due to the fact that five raccoons have decided to sit outside my only door and prevent me from getting out. Every time I look at one, they hiss at me. FML

#21023350
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44261) - you deserved it (5443)

On 01/10/2014 at 6:15am - animals - by RaccoonFever - United States (California)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, my job application got denied once again. I looked over it, and saw that my roommate added "screwing over customers" and "hiding dead bodies" under my skills. FML

#20927127
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44969) - you deserved it (6678)

On 10/20/2013 at 2:21am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43806) - you deserved it (4789)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: