blackbeltpsycho

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Offline (the 07/31/2016 at 8:20am)

blackbeltpsycho

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 October 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1078
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About blackbeltpsycho : I like to consider myself a certified ninja trainer because that sounds way more cool than a martial arts instructor. I've been involved in martial arts for over 9 years now, and I love every minute of it. Feel free to send me a message, I always like talking to new people!

blackbeltpsycho's page activity

Visits<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 8:10pm<b>Genius_Kitty</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 11:58pm<b>MalcolmRodrigues</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 3:27am<b>fmlphoenix</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 12:18am<b>HAMY</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 2:31pm<b>Im_a_Believer</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 8:17pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 11:36am<b>xxrogerthatxx</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:58am<b>abdiG</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 6:04am<b>jack_jill05</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:03pm<b>RnoNative78</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 7:56am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 6:40am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 5:17am<b>atl904</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:19pm<b>ea247</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 1:18am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 1:19am<b>fifil</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 2:52am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 11:25pm

blackbeltpsycho's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of blackbeltpsycho's badges

blackbeltpsycho's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed in Charlie Brown's ghost costume, a white sheet with holes all over. I got beat up for dressing like a member of the KKK. FML

by Halloween Fail / 10/31/2014 at 11:59pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 11:47am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I was flipping out because I couldn't find my wallet, and after several hours of cussing myself out, I went downstairs to make breakfast. I poured cereal into my bowl and my wallet flopped out with the Honey Nut Cheerios. I need to stop drinking. FML

by KasSmoke / 09/29/2014 at 10:13pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

by Sinnersinner / 09/21/2014 at 7:27am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2014 at 11:30am / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

by HappilyNeverAfter / 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, in college, we were asked at what age girls tend to become physically attractive. Wrongly thinking the answer was in relation to puberty, I said "Umm... 11 or 12?" Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of pedophile. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2014 at 2:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, it was my first day closing alone at a pet store when a lady came in wanting to return a bird she bought months ago. Once I informed her there were no returns on livestock, she let the bird free and ran out the door, leaving me to catch it and explain to my manager where it came from. FML

by tay / 09/17/2013 at 11:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I had to explain to my grandfather that Canadians aren't evil by reminding him that he's Canadian. FML

by Anonymous / 09/17/2013 at 10:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

by meganmagee / 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my son asked me if slavery was ever abolished. He's 19. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2013 at 1:42pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my mum got engaged to her American pen-pal, who is in prison over there for murder. FML

by Stheno / 09/16/2013 at 8:49am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

by clean / 09/16/2013 at 3:51am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, a lady stormed into the pharmacy I work at and chewed me out because the medicine I sold her the day before gave her horrible diarrhea as a "side effect". I checked, and it was the medicine she asked for - laxatives. FML

by anonymous / 09/16/2013 at 1:35am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, my doctor asked me to undo my bra so he could check my breathing without the straps restricting my lungs, I got home and told my friends how awkward it was. Not one of them has had this happen to them before. We all go to the same doctor. FML

by chestycough / 09/16/2013 at 12:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health