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birdfreak

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birdfreak

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14404
  • Number of comments : 496
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About birdfreak : Stuff about me is supposed to go here, but I have nothing interesting to say...
Have a lovely day!

birdfreak's page activity

Visits<b>MidnaLink</b> - 21 hours ago<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 10:31pm<b>jill97</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 2:46am<b>MonstreBelle</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 11:40pm<b>liv1222</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:49pm<b>deitcocaine</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 3:11pm<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 10:21pm<b>ahmad163</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 8:16pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:57pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 12:53pm<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 8:57am<b>jordaandanielle</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 2:34pm<b>rhazisr</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 3:13am<b>ChimeraThorne</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 4:00pm<b>Nail7777</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 6:10am<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 1:47pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 8:58pm<b>AscendV</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 1:39am

Fucked!<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 11:57pm

birdfreak's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of birdfreak's badges

birdfreak's favorite FMLs

Today, my teenage daughter found out that she's pregnant, but insists she's still a virgin. Who does she think knocked her up? God? FML

#20996030
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58113) - you deserved it (7570)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, I was quite drunk so I decided to take a piss kneeling down, so I wouldn't miss. I dropped the toilet seat on my little soldier. FML

Today, I've been awake for nearly three days due to homework and my mom's wedding preparations, so I took some adderall to keep me awake at school. I took too much, totally zoned out in class, became hopelessly fascinated by my own hand, and was accused of doing drugs. FML

#20950229
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39191) - you deserved it (21303)

On 11/08/2013 at 12:43pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was escorted out of a grocery store for beating my boyfriend with a block of cheese. FML

Today, I was in my room playing with my pet. I told my snake, "Who needs friends when I have you?" Through the wall I heard my neighbors say, "You do." I've never met my neighbors. FML

#20949324
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42732) - you deserved it (8541)

On 11/07/2013 at 6:08pm - misc - by Where is the faith in Humanity - United States (Washington)

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54871) - you deserved it (5736)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, my grocery shopping consisted of Poptarts, SpaghettiOs, Lucky Charms, Popsicles, Easy Mac, and Twinkies. I'm a 25-year-old woman with no kids. FML

#20947507
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35722) - you deserved it (21702)

On 11/06/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by pathetic (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

#20935170
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49445) - you deserved it (4453)

On 10/27/2013 at 12:11am - misc - by MsConfusedd (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML

#20932403
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39136) - you deserved it (27109)

On 10/24/2013 at 2:04pm - animals - by MBean (man) - Anguilla

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45363) - you deserved it (3368)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML

#20907982
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23116) - you deserved it (51162)

On 10/05/2013 at 2:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52935) - you deserved it (6883)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got in a heated fight and ended up being punched in the jaw. The fight was about Harry Potter. FML

#20856159
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37341) - you deserved it (20444)

On 08/27/2013 at 3:21am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I got fired from my job at an age care facility because I was too nice to my residents. My boss told me "They're deaf, blind and about to jump head first into the grave. We don't pay you to be kind." FML

#20842873
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52229) - you deserved it (2951)

On 08/18/2013 at 7:43am - work - by sweet23 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56154) - you deserved it (3423)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)



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  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

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