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bhavnfun

Offline (the 02/06/2016 at 3:50am) | Search for a member

bhavnfun

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  • Number of visits : 5310
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bhavnfun's page activity

Visits<b>thebeast2349</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 4:11pm<b>Geekman2</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:41am

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YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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bhavnfun's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss called me in to have a serious talk. The "serious talk" was him asking me to notify him of my menstrual cycle ahead of time so he can "avoid that shit". FML

#21446059
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26262) - you deserved it (2697)

On 07/23/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Ma_Nikka (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a piss at a urinal when a fly started harassing me. I got so annoyed, I tried to swat it. Didn't go too well. I ended up losing control of my stream, soaking the guy beside me. He busted my face in. FML

#21445449
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16972) - you deserved it (24935)

On 07/22/2015 at 12:21pm - health - by Anonypiss (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while working security at my job, for the second time, a man with Down's Syndrome entered the store, went to one of the demo computers, opened YouTube, pulled up a video of oiled women wrestling and jerked off. There is no protocol in the handbook for how to deal with this scenario. FML

Today, my religious friend and I ended up having wild sex in the back of his mom's minivan. We got interrupted by a priest knocking at our window. Well played God, well played. FML

#21444515
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30925) - you deserved it (8542)

On 07/20/2015 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by Marika - United States (California)

Today, a customer wanted corporate's number because we aren't allowed to sell pies after midnight. After a drug-fuelled cuss-storm, she punched me in the face through the open window and peeled out of drive-thru like a bat out of hell. FML

#21444376
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24439) - you deserved it (1818)

On 07/20/2015 at 4:21am - work - by TheDrugsAreStrongWithThisOne (woman) - United States

Today, for some reason entirely beyond my knowledge, Siri referred to me as "Sugartits". FML

#21444204
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23540) - you deserved it (3169)

On 07/19/2015 at 9:23pm - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I spent hours cooking a big dinner for my parents for the first time. I guess I made the steak too rare, because when my dad cut into it, he said "Christ! This thing's practically alive!" and said a skilled vet could probably bring the cow it was cut from back to life. FML

#21443824
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22563) - you deserved it (3657)

On 07/19/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while trying to score a date, I almost made a girl pass out. No, I didn't try to chloroform this one. I just came across as so pathetic that she laughed hard enough to have an asthma attack. FML

#21443788
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25374) - you deserved it (2934)

On 07/18/2015 at 11:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML

#21443446
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29792) - you deserved it (3408)

On 07/18/2015 at 7:09am - intimacy - by henhouse - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my son was planning on going clubbing. I disapproved, but no matter what I say he never listens, so I simply offered him some condoms so he doesn't end up knocking anyone up. He just said, "Nah, dad. Get 'em drunk enough and it's anal all the way." FML

#21443327
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32372) - you deserved it (5417)

On 07/18/2015 at 1:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was so incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML

#21443212
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12956) - you deserved it (39463)

On 07/17/2015 at 8:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

#21443162
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27142) - you deserved it (3279)

On 07/17/2015 at 7:04pm - misc - by AK-47 (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34561) - you deserved it (2528)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, whilst still trying to potty train my puppy and keep her from both peeing and pooping in the house, my lactose intolerance kicked in full fledge. Every time I pass gas, she smells poop and believes it's okay to immediately drop a deuce on the carpet. FML

#21441958
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26576) - you deserved it (3773)

On 07/15/2015 at 7:15am - animals - by gassy - United States (Florida)

Today, after working a double shift, I got home to total pandemonium. My dogs had crapped all over the house, my kitchen was soaking wet, etc. My mother, who just moved in with me, was sitting on the couch, saying she had no idea what happened. FML



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