benneth002

Search for a member

Offline (the 06/30/2016 at 6:58pm)

benneth002

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1329
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

benneth002's page activity

Visits<b>ozpunker</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 7:54pm

benneth002's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of benneth002's badges

benneth002's favorite FMLs

Today, I got really horny during a 10 hour shift, so I snuck into a storage room and relieved myself. Then as I went to leave the room, I noticed the security camera above the door. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2016 at 10:09am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I took part in a bouquet toss. The "single ladies" consisted of myself and several girls under the age of ten. I'm 31. FML

by skid / 06/02/2015 at 10:59am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, frustrated with my very energetic kids, I told them that if they dug a hole deep enough in the backyard, they'd find China. What they really found was the previous owner's dog. FML

by pheonixxe / 06/01/2015 at 6:45pm / United States (Wyoming) / Kids

Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend, when a guy pulled a knife and told us to hand over our money. My boyfriend blurted "I don't have shit, dude! She has tons of cash!" The moment the mugger turned to me, my boyfriend ran away at top speed. FML

by kash / 06/01/2015 at 2:14pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally hit my husband in the face. Not 2 minutes later, while laying in bed and trying to apologize, I accidentally kneed him in the balls. FML

Today, a customer complained that his earphones stopped properly functioning even though he bought them less than a month ago. After checking them, I realised that there was so much earwax caked into them that it affected the sound quality. FML

by iGagged / 06/01/2015 at 8:22am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the babysitter not only clogged the toilet, they tried to unclog it with our vacuum cleaner hose. FML

by somebody / 05/31/2015 at 11:37pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got headbutted for saying that Nutella is overrated. FML

by jamisbetter / 04/11/2015 at 8:34am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend repeatedly whispering in my ear, "You want to give me a blowjob". Yes, he actually thought it would work. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2015 at 5:00pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML

by Anonymous / 04/05/2015 at 11:31pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother in law brought a dead rabbit to my nephew saying, "I found the Easter Bunny!" My nephew started crying hours ago and hasn't stopped. FML

by :O / 04/05/2015 at 6:19pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Animals

Today, I had a date over for the first time since I moved out. I made a beautiful dinner… for one of us. I'm so used to cooking for just myself that I only made one serving. FML

by :/ / 04/04/2015 at 8:44pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

by RomanceFail / 04/02/2015 at 8:51am / United States (Kentucky) / Health

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

by usadisvet / 04/02/2015 at 2:43am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, I was reprimanded at work for having a low friendliness rating as a cashier. For two months, out of 1500 transactions, only 3 people filled out the survey. I almost got fired because 1 out of 3 people was mad about a coupon. FML

by Winterbelle / 04/01/2015 at 9:06pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.