Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ben57rocks

Online | Search for a member

ben57rocks

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 376
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ben57rocks's page activity

Visits<b>Tripartita</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 12:15pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 12:19am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 10:24pm<b>batah</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:12am<b>MrSinclair</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 2:00am<b>martin8337</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 8:28am<b>keithsbooty</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:08am<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 3:13am<b>hard_candy</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 10:30am<b>Nexoux</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 10:38am<b>Schizomaniac</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 9:03am<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 11:18am<b>wiseKat99</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 8:29pm<b>eddietuc</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 11:21pm<b>marulicko</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 8:50am<b>opj77</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 11:01pm<b>supersaladtosser</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 3:00pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 5:23pm

Fucked!<b>missa8604</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 6:19am

ben57rocks's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of ben57rocks's badges

ben57rocks's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend asked me where I've always wanted to settle down, and I told her that Italy had always appealed to me. She snorted and told me what a bad idea that was, because "you don't speak French". FML

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

Today, my mom insisted on making my lunch. She didn't know that knives are banned at my high school, and packed me a steak knife for cream cheese. I'm now suspended for 7 days, and she refuses to say that she did anything wrong. FML

#21152537
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53919) - you deserved it (5123)

On 05/26/2014 at 6:34pm - misc - by megangubler - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was helping my wife bring in the groceries. She was able to carry 4 bags and a jug of milk. I was struggling with 2 bags. FML

#21069230
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36023) - you deserved it (21626)

On 02/23/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by weak - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend, feeling pretty low. I said something along the lines of "You like me even when I look like shit." He replied, "Ah, that's just how you naturally look." FML

#20942129
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43490) - you deserved it (7052)

On 11/02/2013 at 1:06am - love - by lucy_g (woman) - United States

Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML

#20584680
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48092) - you deserved it (8737)

On 04/11/2013 at 5:11am - misc - by zahra_786 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

#20110144
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32872) - you deserved it (5253)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML

#18314611
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38375) - you deserved it (12508)

On 11/22/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by toomuch (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92459) - you deserved it (14559)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, one of my really close friends changed from being 'free' to 'quite busy' in the space of one conversation because I suggested that we hang out. FML

#15870197
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (3414)

On 04/21/2011 at 4:33am - misc - by gutted (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML

#15804993
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42962) - you deserved it (6866)

On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML

#13912441
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26720) - you deserved it (6990)

On 11/20/2010 at 2:07pm - kids - by Lexi - Canada

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

#4630669
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (124634) - you deserved it (9477)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61996) - you deserved it (18415)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: