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bazingabitches

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bazingabitches
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2653
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About bazingabitches : Hey! I'm just a regular girl, I like hetalia and black butler and big bang theory. I'm a major Harry potter nerd/band nerd. Bassoon for the win! :) I'm a condescending bitch, but I don't mean to be, so if I offend you I apologize. If you want to know anything else message me! I don't bite.... Maybe.

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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bazingabitches's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a salon. As soon as I walked in, someone ran to me and inspected my hair and said, "We can fix this." I was there to get my daughter's hair done. FML

#5218043
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27508) - you deserved it (5228)

On 09/12/2009 at 11:12pm - misc - by badhair (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I updated an e-mail I've saved to drafts and have been updating every day for the last few months to a girl I really adore. In this letter, I told her everything I ever kept from her. Instead of saving it to drafts again, I accidentally sent it. And she's online. FML

#5206414
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9764) - you deserved it (35085)

On 09/12/2009 at 1:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML

#5187639
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44730) - you deserved it (2306)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56320) - you deserved it (14568)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML

#5185594
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34176) - you deserved it (5254)

On 09/11/2009 at 10:48am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years told me that I was part of an experiment for her Sociology doctorate. I also learned that the notebooks she's been writing in for the past three years aren't for her "doctorate in literature" as she had told me, they were notes on my behavior for the past 3 years. FML

#5166110
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45752) - you deserved it (2858)

On 09/10/2009 at 9:37am - love - by Dave (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my daughter used the kids potty chair on her own for the first time. Bad: The bucket was not in it so poo hit the floor. Good: she tried to clean it... Bad: with her socks. Good: she decided to clean the socks. Bad: she used the wall. Good: she finally called dad. FML

#5164209
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41098) - you deserved it (3914)

On 09/10/2009 at 3:51am - kids - by Udxero (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom found a new favorite game. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of a year and still have not been able to find a job (months after graduating college). Due to this stress I cry easily, her game? Seeing how many times a day she can make me boo-hoo. FML

#5153713
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26754) - you deserved it (6401)

On 09/09/2009 at 6:53pm - misc - by sadchick (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML

#5148313
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (165502) - you deserved it (16648)

On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I washed one of my roommates t-shirts. I forgot to remove it before putting it in the dryer, and all the print on the front melted off. It was a gift from his girlfriend. Who has just passed away. FML

#5138751
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42825) - you deserved it (16431)

On 09/08/2009 at 10:41pm - misc - by whyme27 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

#5136850
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10349) - you deserved it (44099)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:33pm - misc - by JuicyJohn (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, in Chem, I was chosen to hold the fire extinguisher just in case something happened while showing how to blow up a dangerous chemical. My teacher told me to spray if anything got out of control. He lit the fire and I freaked out and sprayed it. The entire wing of my school was evacuted. FML

#5131890
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8116) - you deserved it (38014)

On 09/08/2009 at 6:10pm - misc - by firefighter (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, it was the first day of my job at a kindergarten. A boy fell over in the playground, so I ran over to see if he was OK. He got up and had a huge red mark on the side of his face. Shocked, I yelled "Oh my god, your face!" Turns out it's a very large port-wine birthmark and now he won't stop crying. FML

#5119886
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35606) - you deserved it (12839)

On 09/08/2009 at 12:42am - kids - by GhettoBeast (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I met my boyfriend's mother for the first time. She greeted us holding a baby, and I told her how cute her son was. She told me that it was her grandson. Turns out my boyfriend is the father. We're 16. FML

#5106151
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49057) - you deserved it (3631)

On 09/07/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Notyourstepmom - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend. There were some tents set up out the back so we decided to go in one. When we came out we got weird looks. It turns out my friend had turned on some lights behind the tent, showing a huge silhouette of me giving head. FML

#5102610
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8509) - you deserved it (28480)

On 09/07/2009 at 10:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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