barak263

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barak263

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9538
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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barak263's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:47am<b>bmon</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 10:46pm<b>xAttackAttackx</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 8:15pm<b>Soulsbane96</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 5:47pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 4:19am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 6:16pm<b>nosexlife</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 12:51pm<b>alcalaboy5</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 12:47am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 6:57pm<b>cutiepie292929</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 3:14pm<b>carecow</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 10:25pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 11:43am<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 3:51am<b>gmc_blossom</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 4:32pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 8:23pm<b>illegalbeagle69</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 1:55pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:10pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 12:05am

barak263's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of barak263's badges

barak263's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Devastated, I told my dad about it, hoping he'd help cheer me up. His advice was, "Just rub one out son, you'll feel better in no time." Thanks dad. FML

by Author / 02/24/2014 at 5:22pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML

by fuckmeitsgettingworse / 02/24/2014 at 2:36pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that I'm the only person in my family that our new cat likes. She sleeps on my bed and always sits in my lap and despises everyone else. I'm allergic to cats. FML

by Good choice cat / 02/24/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my mom told me all about how I was conceived in a Disney Land toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2014 at 11:52am / United Kingdom (Dudley) / Love

Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2014 at 10:21am / United States / Transportation

Today, I went to the self-checkout line at Walmart. When I tried to pay, the cash wouldn't go in, so I stood there trying to cram money into the thing that's supposed to take your money. What I didn't realize was that there was a sign up top that said: "No Cash. Cards Only." FML

by I hate Walmart???? / 02/24/2014 at 4:36am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat decided that instead of using the brand-new scratching post I bought him, he was going to use my pant leg while I was asleep. FML

by tornkhakis / 02/24/2014 at 2:20am / United States (Indiana) / Animals

Today, a guy from work that I barely know gave me sunflowers for my birthday. He told me, "You mentioned they were your favorite." I mentioned it to my family at home a few days ago. FML

by You Are My Sunshine / 02/23/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was walking a dog at the animal hospital where I work when it pooped out a rag-like object. I told the doctor, who told me to clean it off to see what it was. It was a rainbow-colored thong. We have to give it back to the owner when they pick their dog up. FML

by crap / 02/23/2014 at 11:01pm / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, I was trying to study for a test when my brother and his friends decided to play the chant game, meaning one person yells something weird and everyone else has to say it back without laughing. All I heard for about two hours was them yelling things like, "DICK NIPPLES." FML

by DIY560 / 02/23/2014 at 10:59pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, while walking barefoot through my house, I saw something shine on the floor across the hallway. Curious as to what it was, I rubbed my foot across the carpet to feel it. It wasn't until it was deeply lodged in my foot did I realize it was an open safety pin. FML

by owmyfoot / 02/23/2014 at 9:22pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my sister finished a project about something she hates. Me. FML

by ninaaaa / 02/23/2014 at 7:34pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

by hot sweet.... not / 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Kids

Today, I've been forced to start packing to go on a vacation with my parents, because they say I've been studying too hard and need a break. I've hardly studied at all and was planning on making up for it all in the time I had left before finals. I'm screwed. FML

by goodbye cruel world / 02/23/2014 at 2:00pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy