barak263

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barak263

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9908
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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barak263's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:47am<b>bmon</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 10:46pm<b>xAttackAttackx</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 8:15pm<b>Soulsbane96</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 5:47pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 4:19am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 6:16pm<b>nosexlife</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 12:51pm<b>alcalaboy5</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 12:47am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 6:57pm<b>cutiepie292929</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 3:14pm<b>carecow</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 10:25pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 11:43am<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 3:51am<b>gmc_blossom</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 4:32pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 8:23pm<b>illegalbeagle69</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 1:55pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:10pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 12:05am

barak263's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of barak263's badges

barak263's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my 5-year-old nephew to clean up his mess of toys. He responded by kicking my foot. My bandaged foot which was still recovering from my surgery last week. I'm probably going to need another operation to fix the damage. FML

by scotsgal / 01/05/2014 at 12:11am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a restaurant for her birthday. She had to go to the toilet while there, and when she came back, she was crying. When I asked why, she said "I'm on my period!" and sobbed loudly in front of everyone that we couldn't have birthday sex. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 8:08pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to a figure holding a knife above me. After I screamed in terror, the figure burst into laughter. It was my mom. She did this as payback for me not washing the dishes last night after making food. FML

by awkwardpartybear / 01/04/2014 at 6:43pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 6:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML

by fuckmuppeter512 / 01/04/2014 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I'm now able to put my acne cream on my face without having to look in the mirror, because I've memorized the crater and trench-filled war zone that is my acne-riddled face. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 1:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I was called by the counselor to discuss my "issues". She told me that other students had reported to her that they saw scars on my arms. I don't cut, I just have a hormonal and aggressive parrot who sees me as his personal tree. FML

by That Girl with the Amazon Parrot / 01/04/2014 at 2:21am / United States / Animals

Today, I lost my virginity. We did it on the floor in my step-sister's room, and the entire time he kept pushing my head into the carpet. I lost my V-card but gained rug burn on my face that looks like a fatal disease. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 1:10am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter started speaking with hashtags. I told her to knock it off, to which she replied, "You don't get it, mom - hashtag white girl probs." Hashtag FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 1:06am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I wrote a text to the guy I've had a crush on for two years. I typed "hey" and put my phone down, not ready to send it. A little while later, I heard it buzz. The reply said "Um... what?" Apparently my sister had added "I'm a shitty prostitute" to my text and sent it. FML

by ... / 01/04/2014 at 12:25am / United States / Love

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

by Elisa_LmR / 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, while visiting my grandparents, my grandpa decided to explain to me the real reason that the old sofa I was sitting on had always been so discolored. He says they were bleach stains left while cleaning up the mess made during my father's conception. FML

by estranger / 01/03/2014 at 5:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

by notsohandy / 01/03/2014 at 5:08pm / Denmark (Midtjylland) / Intimacy

Today, my son was playing The Sims, when I saw him remove the door to a room and set it on fire with a Sim trapped inside. I chuckled at first, until I saw that the Sim was me. Meanwhile, my wife's Sim was happily painting in the next room, not giving a crap. All too accurate, sadly. FML

by Anonymous / 01/03/2014 at 4:50pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, my French wife chose the name of our unborn baby girl. She wants to call her Fanny and won't change her mind. FML

by noway / 01/03/2014 at 6:03am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Kids