Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

badassmf1234

Online | Search for a member

badassmf1234

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 December 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9830
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

badassmf1234's page activity

Visits<b>lucythomson</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 9:57am<b>Ari3l</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 7:51pm<b>SMHsohard</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 7:28pm<b>cooltatgar</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 11:43am<b>neeni88</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 3:24am<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 9:01pm<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 9:03pm<b>tori3700</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 11:34pm<b>AscendV</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:04pm<b>Mas8394z</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 2:11pm<b>Tyriel</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:33am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 6:17am<b>iPixiee</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:40pm<b>my_horrible_life</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:13am<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 8:38am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 8:37am<b>supermoory</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 12:25pm<b>Sethan01</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 10:08am

Fucked!<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 10:11pm<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 2:31am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 4:41am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 11:38pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 4:27pm

badassmf1234's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of badassmf1234's badges

badassmf1234's favorite FMLs

Today, a very drunk woman at the family Christmas party told me she felt terrible that I don't have a mother who cares about me. She is my mother. FML

#21324062
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32689) - you deserved it (2235)

On 12/25/2014 at 3:20pm - misc - by anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

#21323893
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33436) - you deserved it (3472)

On 12/25/2014 at 10:17am - intimacy - by whovian - United States (Maine)

Today, as I walked into McDonald's with my mom, she glanced at me and said, "Smells like your future." FML

#21323487
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29735) - you deserved it (3625)

On 12/24/2014 at 6:56pm - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I found a hornet's nest in the backyard, so I called my brother over to take a look. He said "Hmm, wonder how fast you can run." then hurled a rock at the nest and sprinted back to the house. I wasn't so fast. I now feel like someone's beaten me half to death with a cactus. FML

#21323182
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32882) - you deserved it (3397)

On 12/24/2014 at 9:43am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of six years. She got mad at me, saying she is too young to get married and that I was trying to ruin her career. She is 32 and works part-time at a grocery store. FML

#21322620
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34050) - you deserved it (3070)

On 12/23/2014 at 10:24am - love - by got any coupons? - United States

Today, I got in trouble for going to work sick. Yesterday, I got in trouble for not going to work while sick. FML

#21322171
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30565) - you deserved it (2155)

On 12/22/2014 at 4:36pm - work - by Mandy - United States (Florida)

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37208) - you deserved it (3767)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML

#21311570
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37804) - you deserved it (6018)

On 12/04/2014 at 6:46pm - kids - by aprouddaddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend brought me to a restaurant on a surprise date. I guess he didn't know that my ex-boyfriend now works there, and that he would be our waiter for the evening. FML

#21311019
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31909) - you deserved it (3013)

On 12/03/2014 at 9:49pm - love - by maddieex - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML

#21310827
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36818) - you deserved it (3494)

On 12/03/2014 at 4:21pm - work - by WTF - United States (Texas)

Today, my friend made a fake account on Facebook, pretending to be a girl, and posted my phone number on a sexting group. I've been getting calls and text messages from horny weirdos all day long. FML

#21307548
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32476) - you deserved it (3754)

On 11/28/2014 at 1:43pm - misc - by bullah007 (man) - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

#21306286
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38319) - you deserved it (3160)

On 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm - misc - by void bowels() { cry(); } (man) - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

#21302695
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29287) - you deserved it (2274)

On 11/20/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

#21301098
121 comments

Today, I was watching The Walking Dead while in bed, when I heard a noise in the kitchen. I told myself I was just imagining things. Several hours later, as I was getting ready for sleep, I found out I'd actually been robbed. FML

#21299716
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36382) - you deserved it (5504)

On 11/15/2014 at 5:59pm - intimacy - by Slow_Walker (woman) - Georgia (Dushet'is Raioni)



FML's blog

  • Essa's illustrated FML
  • Yesterday was labor day in the US. FML is international, and and specifically US-centric, but we still sat around doing nothing because we'll take any excuse to do anything. We'll endorse any national…

Friday 1 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: