Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

badassmf1234

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

badassmf1234

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 December 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9624
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

badassmf1234's page activity

Visits<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - one hour ago<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 12:07pm<b>tori3700</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 11:34pm<b>AscendV</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:04pm<b>Mas8394z</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 2:11pm<b>Tyriel</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:33am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 6:17am<b>iPixiee</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:40pm<b>my_horrible_life</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:13am<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 8:38am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 8:37am<b>supermoory</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 12:25pm<b>Sethan01</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 10:08am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 2:28pm<b>emxy92</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 8:24am<b>awkwardtico</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 1:19am<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 10:18pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 1:24am

Fucked!<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 2:31am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 4:41am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 11:38pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 4:27pm

badassmf1234's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of badassmf1234's badges

badassmf1234's favorite FMLs

Today, my drunk mom told me to apologize for being born. FML

#21352091
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34937) - you deserved it (2795)

On 02/08/2015 at 1:28pm - misc - by sorry :/ - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my sister tried to convince me to go to a plastic surgeon, because "Bitchface Syndrome's no joke." FML

#21351489
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28798) - you deserved it (3397)

On 02/07/2015 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wirral)

Today, I experienced the horror of walking in on my best friend fondling his tits. Yes, "his". FML

#21351065
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27606) - you deserved it (2933)

On 02/06/2015 at 6:00pm - misc - by barf (woman) - Ireland

Today, the kid I was tutoring told me that "pirates were a myth. Like the Greeks and Romans." He's 16. FML

#21349360
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32324) - you deserved it (2356)

On 02/03/2015 at 10:39pm - misc - by FrustratedTutor - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boss informed me I couldn't go on my "vacation" because he's leaving for one of his employees' weddings. That just so happens to be my wedding, for which I'm taking the vacation. FML

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

#21347104
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27685) - you deserved it (2891)

On 01/31/2015 at 12:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, when making a delivery for the restaurant I work for, a customer shoved and yelled at me because she didn't get any fries with her order. She didn't order any, which isn't unusual, considering we're a Chinese takeaway and don't even sell them. FML

#21347009
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27899) - you deserved it (1752)

On 01/30/2015 at 8:25pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a booklet came in the mail, addressed to me and titled "How To Train Your Wife". I didn't order it but my wife doesn't believe me. FML

Today, I got attacked by a monkey. My country isn't even supposed to have monkeys in it. FML

#21346049
95 comments

Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-workers anus. FML

#21344664
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24738) - you deserved it (2745)

On 01/26/2015 at 6:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my husband came home, drunk and with lipstick smeared on his face. When I confronted him about it, he just slurred, "Ah don't worry babe, it ain't mine." FML

#21343515
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33334) - you deserved it (2646)

On 01/24/2015 at 3:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML

#21343273
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30471) - you deserved it (4641)

On 01/24/2015 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML

#21342921
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38272) - you deserved it (6728)

On 01/23/2015 at 2:25pm - kids - by nosexforthee (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was diagnosed with gonorrhea. My dad's reaction was to slowly clap at the news then giggle at his own joke. FML

#21342311
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26909) - you deserved it (8970)

On 01/22/2015 at 3:23pm - health - by annoyed (man) - United States (California)

Today, while begging my wife for sex for once, she told me she didn't have time. I said it wouldn't take long. She said "I know." FML

#21341633
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31460) - you deserved it (9792)

On 01/21/2015 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by cuckolddreams - United States (Oklahoma)



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: