Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

baby4mommy

Offline (9 hours ago) | Search for a member

baby4mommy

4Fucked!

baby4mommybaby4mommy
  • Town/Country : Fort Lee, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 May 1981 (34 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 43387
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About baby4mommy : My name is Jamie. My cat Sparkle and I share an apartment just across the river from NYC. In college I studied fine art with an emphasis on oil painting, illustration and a minor in art history. I had a successful career and business until a visit to the ER left me in a coma for 21 weeks. I woke up paralyzed ... unable to even turn my head. After a lengthy recovery at St. Charles and Kessler Institutes I learned how to breathe again without a machine. I also recovered some feeling (about 35%) from above the elbows and upwards. With no feeling below the elbows I am still technically a quadriplegic or partial quad so resuming my art career is still off the table for now. I am highly optimistic about employment as a human doorstop or paperweight.

baby4mommy's page activity

Visits<b>nephilim241</b> - 20 hours ago<b>melisssa87</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 10:14am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 12:39pm<b>C7</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 2:25am<b>Sunflora219</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 11:37pm<b>Dynosaur_dollie</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 9:28pm<b>neneluvsyooh</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 9:11pm<b>hassi158</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 7:52pm<b>Kashkofer</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 10:29pm<b>SnakeGriffin</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 9:08pm<b>IronMan_Mk43</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 2:57pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 6:39pm<b>fuckfuckityfuck</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 10:14pm<b>acidlupin</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 7:27pm<b>TheDragonsGuard</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 4:59pm<b>Kbradley11</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 9:05pm<b>symfora</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 6:29pm<b>AbsoluteTwist</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 4:21pm

Fucked!<b>acidlupin</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 1:28am<b>tmc8907</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 3:03pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 1:24pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 7:51pm

baby4mommy's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of baby4mommy's badges

baby4mommy's favorite FMLs

Today, barely 2 hours into a 5 hour car ride home, my mom accidentally let slip that she's been cheating on my dad. I had to sit with the bitch in a diner for ages while my dad bawled his eyes out alone in the car. FML

#21523579
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20738) - you deserved it (1062)

On 02/07/2016 at 1:11am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out that my university had not accepted the internship I did when I was in college. They placed me in the same bank I interned in, with the same bank manager that I flipped the middle finger at after finishing my internship. FML

#21523525
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10173) - you deserved it (21035)

On 02/06/2016 at 10:36pm - work - by FailingMyCourse - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, it's been five days since I started my new job in a new town, just signed a lease on my new apartment too. Now I find out the company's closing down, and since I'm still on probation, I'm told I'm not entitled to any kind of severance. FML

#21523276
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18176) - you deserved it (1466)

On 02/06/2016 at 1:28am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, my fiancée woke up from a nightmare where I cheated on her. She has so far successfully gotten into my personal and work e-mails, and all my social media. I'm not sure if I'm worse at picking a wife or at picking passwords. FML

#21523145
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18085) - you deserved it (2410)

On 02/05/2016 at 5:55pm - misc - by Alex - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my cat shoved his claw up my nose and got it stuck there. FML

#21523143
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17585) - you deserved it (1618)

On 02/05/2016 at 5:51pm - animals - by ReiracsNeve - United States (Florida)

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

#21523112
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18327) - you deserved it (2224)

On 02/05/2016 at 3:33pm - misc - by UUUGHHH (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I worked up the confidence to go to the mall alone for the first time since being confined to a wheelchair. It didn't even take 20 minutes before some teenager grabbed my wheelchair and tried to race me around, all while his friends watched and laughed. FML

#21523102
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24383) - you deserved it (1103)

On 02/05/2016 at 3:08pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while at work at a small Microsoft partner company, I had to write an email explaining why Internet Explorer is superior to Google Chrome. FML

#21523050
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21601) - you deserved it (2106)

On 02/05/2016 at 11:36am - work - by Coccinelle - France

Today, I shared with my doctor that I still feel uncomfortable with my medication. She expressed surprise, saying, "Really? By now I would've thought it'd be routine." Sorry, no. In three months, I have not gotten used to sticking a syringe up my butt and injecting my rectum full of medicated foam. FML

#21522878
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19447) - you deserved it (1509)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, which he was happy about, until I told him in the interest of fair play he also had to let me fuck him with a strap on. It didn't take him very long to suddenly decide anal is disgusting, with all kinds of health risks. And he thinks he's the smart one. FML

#21522856
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19516) - you deserved it (2957)

On 02/04/2016 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by sandra (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my psycho-obsessed ex-girlfriend blabbed all about how she got a check in the mail for $1000 from CrimeStoppers on Facebook and Twitter. This explains how my current girlfriend and two of my friends all got arrested last week for having weed. FML

#21522828
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17604) - you deserved it (4178)

On 02/04/2016 at 5:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to hide in the closet all morning because my 22-year-old boyfriend didn't want to admit to his parents that he had his girlfriend stay the night. FML

#21522776
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19619) - you deserved it (3317)

On 02/04/2016 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by doodlecrzyMeg (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

#21522725
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19729) - you deserved it (1466)

On 02/04/2016 at 10:16am - animals - by uninvited (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I heard some gossip at school about a weird kid who supposedly jerks off at every house he visits. They were talking about my brother. FML

#21522719
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19746) - you deserved it (1371)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:53am - intimacy - by concernedsis - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to the doctor after being sick for weeks. I found out that I had bronchitis that then progressed to pneumonia. My girlfriend is hearing impaired, and when I can finally get words to come out when I speak, she can't understand them. I'm not sure who I feel more sorry for. FML

#21522623
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18829) - you deserved it (1542)

On 02/03/2016 at 11:59pm - health - by FueledByFate - United States (Arizona)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: