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b4dah15

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b4dah15
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  • Number of visits : 655
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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b4dah15's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML

#20111523
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12926) - you deserved it (1679)

On 10/11/2012 at 1:08am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28525) - you deserved it (6152)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML

#20035075
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25980) - you deserved it (1473)

On 08/22/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML

#20016514
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16903) - you deserved it (1725)

On 08/12/2012 at 5:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a male co-worker asked me in what shape I shave my pubic hair. Jokingly, I replied that I have a very nicely trimmed dodecahedron. Now he's telling everyone at work that I have a venereal disease. FML

#19954177
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17671) - you deserved it (5570)

On 07/18/2012 at 10:41am - work - by butterball (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I was brutally dumped over webcam, by my boyfriend, who was taking a dump with the laptop on his lap. FML

#19899263
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23233) - you deserved it (2261)

On 07/06/2012 at 6:51am - love - by Toilettrash (woman) - United States

Today, I told my friend over the phone that I had to go drop the kids off at the pool. She told me that she didn't need to know about my bathroom habits and hung up on me. I really had to take my children to the local swimming pool for swim lessons. FML

#19844489
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16531) - you deserved it (1769)

On 06/25/2012 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML

#19838531
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24202) - you deserved it (2047)

On 06/24/2012 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as a romantic gesture, my boyfriend gifted me an origami vagina. FML

#19833560
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20718) - you deserved it (3718)

On 06/23/2012 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

#19806269
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26800) - you deserved it (2700)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

Today, I took the bus. The old lady next to me almost fell when the driver stopped, but I managed to catch her. Five minutes later, the same thing happened to me. The old lady tried to help me, but I lost my balance and pulled her skirt down. FML

#19667338
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21257) - you deserved it (1841)

On 05/23/2012 at 11:52am - misc - by alexo - United States

Today, I discovered that my acne glows yellow and orange under black lights while in front of a wall of them at a club. FML

#19630499
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19868) - you deserved it (2070)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:43am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
182 comments

Today, I chipped a tooth trying to solve a Rubik's Cube. FML

#18343530
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7980) - you deserved it (18046)

On 11/25/2011 at 1:27am - health - by yollew - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad and I got into a fight over who gets the last corner piece of the brownies. I ended up with a black eye and and a sprained wrist. He ended up with the brownie and ran away laughing. FML

#18275537
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19851) - you deserved it (5206)

On 11/17/2011 at 7:50pm - misc - by alliez108 - United States



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