Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

auntiecassie

Search for a member

auntiecassie
  • Town/Country : somersworth, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2131
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

auntiecassie's last visitors

sCrEaMiNgToAsTApexReaperNaN101MrEdbryan788egc573trqskqTiwuzFMyLifeGod040

auntiecassie's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of auntiecassie's badges

auntiecassie's favorite FMLs

Today, my crush asked to use my phone so he could Google something. Flattered that he wanted to use my phone, I agreed. After he was done, he handed it back with a weird look. I later realized he had found himself in my top searches. FML

#20058304
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6868) - you deserved it (23043)

On 09/05/2012 at 12:29am - misc - by Gigi (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a bug on a stranger's arm and as a knee-jerk reaction smacked it. It took me a second before I realized it was actually a loose scab. FML

#20057702
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5846) - you deserved it (18862)

On 09/04/2012 at 6:02pm - misc - by CantPublish - United States

Today, I learned I'm not allergic to gluten. My mom has kept me on a gluten free diet since I was 5. She was convinced I was allergic to it. I'm 25 and I am writing this over my first slice of pizza in 20 years. FML

#20057669
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26605) - you deserved it (1428)

On 09/04/2012 at 5:38pm - health - by Emma - United States (Missouri)

Today, I'm quite ill. My new step-mother believes that the genetic wheat allergy I got from my mother would have gone away since she's now married to my father instead. Looks like dad picked a winner. FML

#20057050
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21706) - you deserved it (977)

On 09/04/2012 at 4:53am - misc - by hooligyn123 - United States

Today, the pharmacist warned me that my antibiotics might cause slight gastrointestinal distress. The fact that I have been on the john for the past 90 minutes drenched in sweat would lead me to believe our definitions of "slight" are a bit different. FML

#20047681
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17906) - you deserved it (1093)

On 08/29/2012 at 9:12am - health - by jdch_99 - United States

Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML

#20045566
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27679) - you deserved it (5416)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML

#20045388
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24801) - you deserved it (1473)

On 08/27/2012 at 10:57pm - misc - by spekledworf - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

#20043967
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27569) - you deserved it (2318)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my wife and I got in a 4-hour heated argument which resulted in her begging for a divorce and admitting that she cheated on me. This all started with us arguing about the instructions for our new IKEA table. FML

#20043524
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22362) - you deserved it (1567)

On 08/26/2012 at 10:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

#20043181
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20707) - you deserved it (2516)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

#20042325
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19359) - you deserved it (1684)

On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my crush didn't remember calling me beautiful, telling me he liked me, or any of the other romantic things he said to me while drunk last night. He did however remember me promising to bake him cookies. FML

Today, a thirty-something guy swaggered into my workplace. He was wearing shutter shades and torn jeans, and claimed to be our new boss. I called security to throw him out, at which point he produced his ID and let me know I'd be attending an employee review session next week. FML

#20039859
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18366) - you deserved it (6483)

On 08/24/2012 at 8:20pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML

#20039795
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21673) - you deserved it (1426)

On 08/24/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by ipayyourbillsgorramit (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML

#20039608
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15957) - you deserved it (3080)

On 08/24/2012 at 5:10pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Walsall)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: