audreys510

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Offline (the 10/29/2015 at 12:08pm)

audreys510

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 30 May 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3040
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About audreys510 : I'm Audrey. I'm 18, a senior in college...I'm a mathematics major, computer programming minor. I also have a passion for makeup. I work as a research assistant in an economics research lab.

audreys510's page activity

Visits<b>oliversoden101</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 3:44am<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 7:30pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 6:22pm<b>Rozeyyy</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 7:12pm<b>IAmzephyr</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 3:23am<b>najraa</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 7:30pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 3:10am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:16pm<b>Emmamazing</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 7:35pm<b>Gallik01</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:19pm<b>Skyzeri</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 2:26am<b>_powerslave666</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 2:38pm<b>1R1X0X0</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 9:49am<b>Brittin8or</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 9:59am<b>HarrisonX</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 6:51am<b>seabass0923</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:05pm<b>LamentedSugar27</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 2:07am<b>CareFreeBanana</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 11:29am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 1:02am<b>seabass0923</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 4:05am

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Judgmental

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audreys510's favorite FMLs

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 5:11am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

by ANON / 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

by ew / 08/11/2013 at 9:09am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2013 at 6:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mum picked up a bunch of tissues that were scattered around my room. She examined them, then asked me to stop wasting her potential grandchildren. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2013 at 6:24pm / Egypt / Intimacy

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

by hardee fucking har yourself, sir / 08/07/2013 at 6:00pm / United Kingdom (Stockport) / Miscellaneous

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

by turning red / 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the Giants game. During the seventh inning stretch they showed me on the jumbo-tron. It was just in time for the entire stadium to see me pull a tampon out of my purse. FML

by GiantsFan13 / 07/23/2013 at 10:49am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I confessed to losing my wife's engagement ring, and replacing it with a lookalike months ago. My wife also confessed that her actual engagement ring was locked in the safe, and the one I lost had been a fake. I've been paying the replacement off on my credit card for 6 months. FML

by RonnieG / 07/22/2013 at 6:30pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I got fired from my job as a seafood manager because an entire wedding group came in and started yelling at me, saying the shrimp was horrible and I ruined their wedding. They showed me the leftovers; they never cooked them. They fed raw shrimp at a wedding dinner party. FML

by Gross / 07/21/2013 at 7:20pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, while filling out paperwork at the dermatologist, it asked what color I would use to describe my skin tone. When the nurse saw I chose fair, she mumbled "Ghost is more like it." I have a severe sun allergy. FML

by Ghostly / 07/21/2013 at 11:03am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, after being unemployed for almost two years, I was turned down for yet another job. The reason this time? I live too far from the job. I can see the building from my bedroom window. FML

by yoshithecat / 07/19/2013 at 8:31am / United Kingdom (Slough) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I suddenly started having excruciating pain. My husband took me to the ER, where I waited for three hours in agony to be seen. By the time a doctor got to me, the pain had mostly gone, but it was found to be a kidney stone. I was told, "Next time, don't wait so long." Really? FML

by Orchard / 07/16/2013 at 1:25pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

by speechless / 07/13/2013 at 10:32am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

by ouch / 07/12/2013 at 3:22am / United States / Miscellaneous