Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

artiststatement

Offline (the 03/02/2015 at 3:24am) | Search for a member

artiststatement

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 October 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13299
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

artiststatement's page activity

Visits<b>ImpracticalJoekr</b> - 12 hours ago<b>immaloser95</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:02am<b>rush01</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 1:13am<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 1:45am<b>thomasrasmussen7</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 10:09pm<b>mlwalker88</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 2:30pm<b>I_Am_A_Rock</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 7:05am<b>Ashd09</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 2:28am<b>TommyG493</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:40am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:34am<b>birdybirdchirp</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:30am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 12:25am<b>packrat</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 9:44am<b>saocrates</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:57am<b>Damafia</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 7:28am<b>gogators941</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 1:20pm<b>emilyporter_14</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:46pm<b>The_Stinsonator</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 5:21am

artiststatement's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of artiststatement's badges

artiststatement's favorite FMLs

Today, as a science teacher, I did a science experiment in front of a class. One of my students asked me if it was "photoshopped." He was being serious. FML

#20930096
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42346) - you deserved it (2827)

On 10/22/2013 at 10:24am - kids - by jdawn99 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45999) - you deserved it (4871)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, I was assigned to fill in for a French teacher who was out sick. I had asked the class to name some French-speaking countries. I called on one girl and she replied, "Uh, Europe. That's, like, the only other one, right?" Nobody disagreed. I'm filling in for the rest of the month. FML

#20929522
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41075) - you deserved it (2590)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:40pm - work - by :| - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the kid next to me asked me, in all seriousness, if gay people have feelings like regular people. I'm gay, and I have to sit next to this barnacle until June. FML

#20929195
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49163) - you deserved it (8412)

On 10/21/2013 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43663) - you deserved it (4774)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27276) - you deserved it (39138)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML

#20923758
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46720) - you deserved it (5266)

On 10/17/2013 at 7:51am - misc - by Michelle (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for knowing more about Batman than he does. He's only seen some of the movies, and as a kid my dad owned a comic book store. He still doesn't see why I should know more, because I'm a girl, and "girls aren't supposed to know about super heroes." FML

#20921778
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50816) - you deserved it (3752)

On 10/15/2013 at 5:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML

#20921768
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46884) - you deserved it (4693)

On 10/15/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by secretsmakefriends (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21665) - you deserved it (81726)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, after sending in my passport application for a trip to Paris, I got a letter from the state department saying despite them having my original birth certificate, I don't exist. Upon calling them, I was told that it only proves I'm a citizen, not that I exist. I pay taxes and have a mortgage. FML

#20916188
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42356) - you deserved it (2349)

On 10/11/2013 at 7:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I dreamt that I beat someone up for using Comic Sans in a project. Now I can't look at him without being irrationally angry. FML

#20914246
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32691) - you deserved it (6350)

On 10/09/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by Ellie (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was working a kid's birthday party dressed as a clown. The child's mother made me change because he was scared of clowns. The only thing I had in my car was a princess costume that was owned by a girl co-worker. So for 4 hours I had to entertain in a tight pink dress. I'm a guy. FML

#20913049
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41787) - you deserved it (4461)

On 10/08/2013 at 9:19pm - kids - by Allycat (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got my two-year-old's Halloween costume in the mail. I tried it on him to make sure it fit. He loves it so much that he is now having a complete meltdown because he wants to go trick-or-treating. He doesn't understand we only go trick-or-treating on Halloween. 23 more days to go. FML

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: