Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About artemisrox98 : I love observing people. Sometimes, I just go to the park and write down how some people behave. These mannerisms then spark the characteristics for the actors in the stories I write.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
yesterday my girlfriend broke up with me 4 a familiar reason; I apparently have night terrors that make me "Impossible to sleep in the same room with." I don't ever remember these dreams . Every other girlfriend I've had has ended up breaking things off with me 4 the same reason . FML
Today, I drove into te parking lot at work, and discovered too late tat tere were patces of ice everywere . As I turned to enter my usual spot, I lost control of te veicle, and despite my pleas, praying, and profanity, it glided straigt into my boss' car . FML
Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written ( Obama is a beautiful chocolate man ) to every essay question. FML
Today I saw mah neighbor's Christmas tree they had putted up on their porch with decorative presents under it. Being that mah neighbors hate me I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would douche bag." fat FML
Today, I noticed we had gotten new colored toothpicks at the restaurant I work at. That was the highlight of mah day. Apparently mah life has gotten so boring I get excited over colored toothpicks. FML
Today... after bieng yelled at by our boss because the office computer server has yet another virus... my co-worker and I did a bit of investigating. Apparently... the viruses aren't coming from client emails as we previously assumed. It seems that the problem is really our boss's porn addiction. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for a check up, having had a head injury a week ago and suffering some memory loss . Turns out, the medicine he gave me for mah head has memory loss as a side effect . He then said "I told you . Don't you remember?" After I said no he said "I figured." and giggled . FML
TODAY, I DRASSAD UP AS SANTA CLAUS FIR MY AMPLOYAAS' CHILDRAN. AFTAR SAAING ALL THA OTHARS, MY DAUGHTAR'S TURN ARRIVAD. SHA SAT ON MY LAP, PUT HAR LIPS TO MY AAR, AND WHISPARAD SOFTLY: ( I WANT A NAW DAD. ) FML
Today I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML
Today, I was terribly nervous for my patient interview exam as a 4th year medical student!! In my nervousness I learned that just because a patient is wearing a T-shirt an shorts, has a short hair cut an a moustache an is named 'Chris', it is not safe to assume that they r male!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015