anothemy

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Offline (the 06/06/2015 at 11:47pm)

anothemy

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 517
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

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anothemy's page activity

Visits<b>Steephx0</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 5:21am<b>andy594328</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 12:59pm<b>Immortal_Toaster</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 12:42am<b>taku05</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 4:04am<b>rob02</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:40am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 10:09am<b>HotBox69</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 4:54am

anothemy's FML badges

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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anothemy's favorite FMLs

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 9:31am / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, while out shopping, I could hear what sounded like two grown men talking about me, and they were being pretty gross. I turned around to scold them and it turned out being a dad and his 13-year-old son. He said he was, "teaching a son to be a man, and that my ass was grounds for discussion." FML

by tlm84 / 07/27/2014 at 10:54pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, a customer threatened to smash my face in because I wouldn't give him a veteran's discount on a donut. He looked like he'd eaten his way out of fat camp, and it seemed the only action he'd seen was fighting his way into a lard factory. Still, he swung fast, and I now have a black eye. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2014 at 5:23pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I found that I conduct so much static electricity that I'm periodically given a shock by my headphones as I walk with them on. 5ML

by PangolinScholar / 01/24/2014 at 7:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

by DisgustinglyFrustrated / 10/10/2013 at 11:40am / Argentina (Santa Fe) / Intimacy

Today, I woke to find my laptop and printer covered in what smells like pee. My boyfriend then confessed to me that he occasionally "sleep-pees". It's like sleepwalking, but where he urinates on random objects. FML

by marcymoo / 03/11/2013 at 12:09am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find that while my husband and children were mindlessly watching TV, one of our dogs got into the cupboard that stores the deep fryer. He got the lid off, ate all of the old oil and barfed everything up on the couch. FML

by Sammy / 02/25/2013 at 2:25am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my husband went downstairs to play Call of Duty. When he came back after only 20 minutes I said, "Awww, did you miss me?" He said, "No, the controller died." FML

Today, my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years still refuses to memorize my phone number or remember my birthday because he says there is a limited amount of space in his brain and he does not want to push any important information out. FML

by skidoosh / 07/13/2011 at 9:44pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

by wtf / 06/09/2011 at 11:04am / United Kingdom (Edinburgh) / Health

Today, I finally convinced a girl that I liked to have sex. I decided to swoop her off the feet like the movies and carry her to my bed. I ended up hitting her head on the door frame, knocking her out. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2009 at 3:09pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML